Help required - Which doctor first? what to tell work? repeated occurance

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Tones

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Hi all,
this place was recommended to me - I had no idea such amazing things exist and am in awe of people's willingness to support. SO thank you in advance.

I am completely new to the topics of PD and associated symptoms and am learning on the fly but have done a bit of reading... I also don't know if what I am dealing with is PD, but a lot of symptoms point towards it.
My brother in law - Lets call him Bro - is in a bit of a bad state. I have temporarily moved in with him as support, to help him get through some of the "load" but also to get some clarity on the situation so that I can get best medical/professional support. This is not the first "intervention" of the situation, but it is my first.

My "immediate" Question/objective:
- we are currently in a "tricky" situation between with Work, Insurance and Psychiatrist and need some advice as to the "best steps" to undo something that can go horribly wrong and mitigate the outcome.
Could someone point me in the right directions or discuss possible options/scenarios? I personally am not native to the UK and do not know the INs and OUTs of Doctors hierarchy, referrals and Insurance interactions.

There are plenty more questions later, I am certain. Thanks in advance.

Here is a short summary of the situation (as I know it):
- He was Diagnosed with "Depression" at 21 and put on medication. He has been on it ever since.
- A snowboarding accident in 2010 saw both legs crushed and severe surgery and subsequent pain medication.
- He is highly intelligent and has a high pressure, high earning job in a big city.

Scroll forward quite a few years.
- An opioid addiction came to light. An "unsuccessful" intervention / Treatment  occurred which was followed by an Anti depressant addiction of some sorts.
- He has been diagnosed with "Anxiety"  (I assume General Anxiety Disorder) following it - approx. 2.5 years ago.. (this was by his 2nd Psychiatrist - I don't know what "happened" to the first)
- He lives alone without many friends and is going through a long divorce
- He has been off work since (approx. 2.5 years and only recently started a phase in back to work
- There have been a couple of occurrences of substance abuse and "blackouts" since that I am aware of

Scroll forward to today:
-  Another incident occurred this weekend, of which we were notified by concerned bystanders. He had taken 10 pills of Xanax.
- My wife came to see him and evaluate the situation - he was still completely out of it. I have moved in with him since Sunday and am helping him deal with the bouquet of immediate troubles/symptoms causing him sleepless nights.
The symptoms/troubles/Demons I have established, are:
- He has significant financial troubles
- He has developed a fine way of not telling the truth to "protect" himself
- He has a Codine addiction - he has had numerous attempts at getting off it on his own
- He has anxiety issues - particularly about work
- His personal health insurance will not cover any further Anxiety related treatments. (since it is now a "chronic" illness)
- I believe his Psychiatrist has been lied to and has falsely diagnosed him.
- Work still believe he is in the phase in period, but I do not think he should be going in to work and risking doing more damage. (I don't know exactly what he has told them)


I think there are more, but it is difficult to evaluate at the moment. He is currently trying again to get himself off the codine (with my help) but that obviously makes sensible discussions difficult.

Any help is welcome!

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notrightinthehead

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Gosh, that can't be easy for you. I think you might find a lot of information that is relevant for you on the nar anon uk website.
Anyway, welcome here. I am sorry you had to find us and glad that you did. 
Our march to freedom is irreversible. We must not allow fear to stand in our way.  Nelson Mandela

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Tones

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Thank you @notrightinthehead. I will take a look.  :stars:

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Spring Butterfly

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  • Individuation = our key to emotional freedom
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Tones, just a word of caution for yourself as well. You are so kind to take this on and try to help. Please be aware that humans only change when they wish to change. It's easy to know that but lose sight of the fact when you're in the middle of trying to help with a situation. It could become something long-term and a rabbit hole of frustration.

There is only so much you can do until he wants to make significant changes himself and often times there is something called "secondary gain" which regardless of the subject chosen becomes somewhat of an addiction in and of itself.

This link might help with some perspective as well
https://www.outofthefog.website/treatment/
...although I do believe you're dealing with an addict more than a PD the information may be helpful.

I can also recommend the toolbox topic what to do for just about any difficult life situation. Wishing you and your wife peace.
Every interaction w/ PD persons results in damage. Plan accordingly, make time to heal
Individuation is the key to emotional freedom
It's foolish to expect of others what they have no capacity to give
If others were self observant, introspective, this forum would not exist