They Know More Than We Think

[Kat54]

I've suspected for years my ex may be gay. If he is that's fine and I would love for him to be happy to live authentically.  Though he's always been negative and privately his angry demeanor and verbal abuse drove our marriage to end. I think his private struggles with appearing perfect in every way has led to his anxiety and anger issues.
Other people not in our family have thought the same. So my daughter told her cousin recently she Thinks her father is gay. Don't know what brought on the conversation. My sister accidentally overheard a little then asked her daughter about it.
It would maybe ease my guilt a little for divorcing him. Many things were never right.  I'm thankful my daughter has someone to talk to. We talk but have not mentioned anything about her father or I divorcing since the it was finalized and she would never come to me asking about that. I had only told our kids there were many issues, some I talked about but there were things they didn't need to know, one of them being his sexual orientation.

[notrightinthehead]

Kat,  have you considered what it is inside you, that makes you feel guilty? You were desperately unhappy in your marriage. You felt unloved and abused. You took responsibility for yourself and decided to end this unpleasant situation. You could feel proud, elated, happy that you got away. But you feel guilty. So why do you need to feel guilty?  It might be,  that if you start looking inside yourself you no longer have to concern yourself with your ex and his troubles.

[Kat54]

You are so correct. He isn't my worry anymore and I have to let go of that. Again I have dreams about him, we aren't together anymore but he's there.