just an observation

[losingmyself]

Last night H and I were watching a show on you tube, it was a guy who normally works on cars, but this time he was fishing with his son at his parents pond.
The boy was probably 5 or 6. Cute as a bug. Hyper, but normal for his age. When he would catch a fish, which was often, he would walk backwards to pull this fish in and his F had to keep saying "reel it in, don't run backwards, buddy"  But the boy kept doing it. He was excited, and his F was very patient, just reminding him every time not to run back, just keep reeling the fish in.
I noted my H getting more and more agitated with this child, because in his mind, he was intentionally not listening to his dad. I thought about what H would have done in this situation. He definitely would have made the child stop running backwards. Also, he would have taken all the fun out of it, because the child "Just wouldn't listen" We probably would have been done fishing.
I wanted to remind him that he was only 5 or 6, and he was excited, so he would forget. But that would have led to a monologue about what a bad mother I was and how I spoiled the kids, and whatever else he could criticize me for, so I kept quiet and just observed, like a scientist in a lab. It is interesting, watching his mind run, like I can see what he's focusing on.
I know I was a bad mother, but not for the things he accuses me of.

[blunk]

Losingmyself, it's great that you were able to observe and not engage. It's amazing that a pwpd could become agitated just watching a video like that, even as the father responded calmly. It's true, they do have a way of taking the fun out of most any situation. Good for you for handling the situation as you did. Now you need to get his voice out of your head, you are not a bad mother!