Solo mini- break

Started by Hattie, July 02, 2021, 04:17:28 PM

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Hattie

Just wanted to share that I have taken myself on a solo mini break to the seaside! I am staying in a cute, traditional bed and breakfast. I had a swim in the sea and mosey around town. Stopped off for a coffee and ice cream and then had a so- so curry in a restaurant. Feels like quite a big step as I have not had a night away since the pandemic started. I felt quite anxious about it, but I have had a nice time so far. I did a lot of travelling alone when I was younger but these days it seems to bring up abandonment/ unworthiness feelings. Holding it together so far though, lol
Love is patient; love is kind.
It does not envy; it does not boast.
It is not proud. It does not dishonour others.
It is not self-seeking. It is not easily angered.
It keeps no record of wrongs.
Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.

1 Corinthians 13: 5-8.

Poison Ivy


notrightinthehead

Enjoy! Have a good time.
I can't hate my way into loving myself.

1footouttadefog

Good for you.  I want to do similar with my college age kids.  Just a quick trip to enjoy the beach.  It sounds wonderful to relax at a bnb.

I also have another quick trip in my head.  I want to go to a beach front camp ground and fish and cook out.  Being sandy, and sunburned, and roasting tidbits of meats and veggies and pineapple in a fire and drinking cold or chilled adult beverages until it finally cools down enough to sleep, then getting up to go deep sea fishing the next morning then driving home with a cooler of fish.

That past part is fantasy unless I find a good seafood market.

Some of my best vacations have been overnight or day trips. I hope you have lots of nice experiences.

JustKeepTrying

Oh that sounds like bliss and I admire your bravery!

Free2Bme

Hattie,

This sounds wonderful,  I love the ocean... and curry.  I hope you will be able to replace old thought patterns will new and hopeful ones.  Enjoy your R & R !

 

1foot,

I share in your fantasy.  That sounds dreamy, all except for the sand.  I would add kite flying  :sunny:

moglow

Hattie I do that from time to time too. No schedule, no set plan, trying new places or revisiting old. I think it's good for the soul, gives us a new perspective!
"She had not known the weight until she felt the freedom." ~Nathaniel Hawthorne, The Scarlet Letter
"Expectations are disappointments under construction." ~Capn Spanky, The Nook circa 2005ish

SeaBreeze

Sounds lovely! Let's just say my account name SeaBreeze was inspired by plans to eventually live seaside and PD-free. Enjoy the sun, sand, and surf!  8-)

Hilltop

Oh that sounds lovely, that's exactly what I would be doing as well, swim in the sea, coffee, ice-cream, curry, a nice walk around town.  It sounds so relaxing, enjoy it.

You get to do what you want, when you want and lie in the sun and relax away.  I wish I was there. :)

Sapling

Good on you Hattie  :applause: I hope you enjoy your mini-break and it turns out to be the treat you needed. Even if those feelings of unworthiness or abandonment come up at some point, know that it takes a brave person to feel those feelings. Lots of people stay in awful situations just to avoid them (to no avail) but you're out there on your own. I hope you get lots of sunshine while you're there :)

SonofThunder

Quote from: Hattie on July 02, 2021, 04:17:28 PM
Just wanted to share that I have taken myself on a solo mini break to the seaside! I am staying in a cute, traditional bed and breakfast. I had a swim in the sea and mosey around town. Stopped off for a coffee and ice cream and then had a so- so curry in a restaurant. Feels like quite a big step as I have not had a night away since the pandemic started. I felt quite anxious about it, but I have had a nice time so far. I did a lot of travelling alone when I was younger but these days it seems to bring up abandonment/ unworthiness feelings. Holding it together so far though, lol

Enjoy your mini-break and good for you in taking the leap of faith and creating one for yourself!

SoT
Proverbs 17:1
A meal of bread and water in peace is better than a banquet spiced with quarrels.

2 Timothy 1:7
For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline.

Proverbs 29:11
A fool gives full vent to his spirit, but a wise man quietly holds it back.

JollyJazz

Yaaay! Go Hattie!

Wonderful that you are doing this and
I hope you can get in lots of nice self care.

I find solo mini breaks can be wonderful times for healing.

Sometimes it can put you in touch with feelings that need to be processed.

I went on a solo mini break myself about a month and a half ago when I was feeling low. I did lots of things like swimming and going to a cute movie theater, journalling, extra doses of sleep and hiking and it really helped with processing what I was going through and shifted my mindset.

Best wishes and a big thumbs up from JollyJazz!!!  :)

Oscen

Hi Hattie,

This sounds so lovely, especially coffee and ice cream by the seaside... you're giving me a mini-break in my mind just thinking about it so thanks! Glad to hear you're enjoying yourself.  :D

It's interesting how travelling alone has shifted in meaning for you throughout your life. Thank you for sharing this - the shifting sands of trauma are strange at times, so hearing real experiences from real survivors is so powerful.

Lookin 2 B Free

Thanks for sharing this, Hattie, and bringing some inspiration.

I used to do lots of little trips all those decades I lived with spouse, kids, etc . . . often traveling with them and sometimes alone so I could find some quiet and be alone with my thoughts.  I absolutely loved it, both ways.

Now, in my 60's and living alone and unpartnered, which I only ever had a little of as a young adult, even contemplating this kind of thing brings such a sense of loss and hurt.  I haven't done what you're doing yet.

Slowly, slowly, with baby steps,  following the path of those who've gone before me.  I have to remember it's a hopeful path, something I didn't have sharing a life with a pwPD.

Hattie

Thanks very much for all your replies! I really loved reading them, and hearing about the trips you have been making, and the ones you have been dreaming about or contemplating!

I was only away for 1 night, which felt just right. It was really nice and seemed to recharge my batteries a bit. In the end, I didn't really struggle with difficult feelings. I think it helps that I kept it simple and went for a straightforward kind of trip.

The cat wasn't happy when I got back, she has definitely got very attached to me during lockdown... that was a bit upsetting.

I think I am ready to do something more though, so I have booked a 3 night trip to a yogic alpaca farm next month😆 I will be staying in a really huge barn which I think might feel a bit odd by myself, but maybe I can find a way to fill the space! Xx
Love is patient; love is kind.
It does not envy; it does not boast.
It is not proud. It does not dishonour others.
It is not self-seeking. It is not easily angered.
It keeps no record of wrongs.
Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.

1 Corinthians 13: 5-8.

Jolie40

#15
Quote from: Hattie on July 08, 2021, 04:08:42 PM
so I have booked a 3 night trip to a yogic alpaca farm next month😆 I will be staying in a really huge barn which I think might feel a bit odd by myself, but maybe I can find a way to fill the space! Xx

that sounds cool; enjoy!

husband used to book me into local hotel once in a while to give me a break
husband/child would come swim & then I'd stay the night by myself to watch TV & scrapbook
be good to yourself

pianissimo

I used to take light study-trips by myself that involved classes about something I'm interested, eating out and swimming. I miss doing that. I'm not sure if I would have the finances to do it again which makes me sad.