New year new me

[Gettintired76]

This a continuation of Thanksgiving, yes square I believe the job will be a definite game changer.

[square]

  to the new you!

[Gettintired76]

I am sooo pissed at my ex's stupidity and irresponsibility right now. We were warned for 4 days that a blizzard was coming, she and her husband waited til the damn thing started and decided they had to go to the store got their car stuck ( with my kids with them) and made the kids walk at least 2 miles home. (It was 25 degrees with 50-60 mph winds zero visibility.

[square]

Oh that is just stupid. It's fine for them but putting the kids in that situation ughhhhh.

[Boat Babe]

Log EVERYTHING

[escapingman]

 

I am rooting for you Getintired76, we can all do this!

[PlantFlowersNotWeeds]

I think the more experiences my son has had with his father over the years, he appreciates my consistency.  He knows my moods (normal range) and can count on me being a responsible parent.  If he has a question about school, activities, his future, or needs something that has to be done by a deadline, he seeks me out. His dad is all fluff stuff, like what car they are going to buy (so unrealistic because they both have zero money, but it's funny to listen to).

I'm so glad that your children are okay, what a scary situation.   I don't remember on your post the ages of your children - do they have their own cell phone?  If they are young, you can get them one just to make calls.  That might make you feel a little better knowing that they can contact you without relying on their mother.  I'm sure you have, but I would make sure they know how to reach out for help - when to call 911, medical help, etc...   Again, this may make you feel a tiny bit better.

[Gettintired76]

My kids are 14 11 and 10 the two youngest are special needs (autism and epilepsy related brain injury). My 14 yr old has a phone but where his mother likes to take it from him and go through is conversations he doesn't do much with it anymore.

[Gettintired76]

Both my son and my oldest daughter have inherited complications with there knees and have difficulty walking large distances without pain, my daughter is supposed to have wraps for her knees to control swelling and fluid build up I have informed my ex of this but whether or not is doing it I don't know. Both of them are supposed to have ibuprofen available for pain and swelling but I highly doubt she keeps it as she as never been keen on keeping medication readily available.

[Gettintired76]

My ex's husband has been sharing rape jokes and other exploitive ideologies with my son. I have tried to instill that such ideologies and humor are inappropriate but just have it ignored as that I have no sense of humor.

[Gettintired76]

He has expressed to the child that the ideal woman is " three square meals a day and sex any time he wants". I have talked with my son at length about this. I myself was raised in a very "female strong" family, but even at that the men were never dehumanized or devalued. I feel it was a very healthy environment for me as that it showed the value and importance of both sexes with no economical or emotional constraints on either.

[Gettintired76]

I hope I didn't say something that offended anyone.

[square]

Not offended. Just seems sad and overwhelming. Keep being a role model and also see about getting your son help.

[Gettintired76]

I'm trying she won't let me near him, seems she is grooming him to be her new man's son.

[square]

Yeah, I know access is limited.

I don't know if the school could be a resource.

[Gettintired76]

Yeah and now it's even more limited she has blocked me on Facebook and has her phone blocked

[square]

Just keep going with getting your ducks in a row - CDL and trucking job, lawyer, etc.

You'll suddenly be unblocked again when she wants to get rid of the kids for a day or two.

Give the ducks everything you've got.

[Gettintired76]

Somebody called CPS on my ex, all hell broke loose she called me screaming and cussing blaming me, my 11 yr old was arrested at school yesterday and she won't tell me where they have her, and claims CPS informed her she is well within her rights keeping the kids away from me, that I was doing the damage to them.

[square]

Wow.

I think I would be reaching out to CPS now, tonight or tomorrow, to get the truth on record.

You need to keep calm and stay credible. Don't match her crazy, don't start spewing accusation. You are the father. You are deeply concerned about the children and their mother. You don't know what to do. You welcime their help. You've been looking into legal options and have a great new job.

If you're asked if you did this crazy thing, don't get mad. Just say no, that never happened. You can be upset with concern for your kids but not angry at their mom (frustration is fine, not fury).

I have no experience here whatsoever, this is just my feeling on this.

It's showtime, and I hope it will work out.

I assume there is only one juvenile detention center in your area. Call them, tonight.

[Gettintired76]

She's not in detention she in a psyche hospital just don't know which one