Still healing 2

[Gettintired76]

I dont know square and i dont know how a system can just ignore it. So im totally drunk right now and freakin listening to Phil Collins so im think way too much

[Gettintired76]

I meant sorry

[square]

I know it. I know the system lets so many down.

Enjoy Phil. Been listening to that Offspring song a ton, mostly the 2021 but also the 1997, great guitar on the original.

[Gettintired76]

Oh the 97 has most excellent guitar. Was bawling my freakin eyes out listening to 2021 a minute ago

[Gettintired76]

I dont know im so far past everything thing i don't know if i can process anymore, i mean i love my children more than my own life but i just dont know how much farther i can go the look on my babies face and they just give a fuck just fuckin mutter im sorry im done with the system the caseworker is a damn pothead who i swear didnt even know what damn planet he was on and all i get is an im sorry then ignore what ive got as evidence its like why the fuck you have me bring it if your not gonna even look at it?

[Gettintired76]

Im sorry if I offended anybody I told I ws drunk Ill repost in the AM

[square]

No offense over here.

I don't remember if I've asked before but can you prove those payments? I hope you're writing checks rather than forking over piles of cash. Your ex's husband just loves having another man support his wife and the kids under his roof. And your ex loves having an ATM that spits out money on tears.

[Gettintired76]

Credit card so i have record

[square]

Good.

[Gettintired76]

And I gave up years ago on her paying back what she promises, if me and my family actually had all her "paybacks" we'd be rich

[square]

Five grand is far more than my family goes through in a month, mortgage included.

You're paying far more than child support.

In your shoes I'd rather make a direct Internet payment for your son, or purchase actual groceries for your children. It's still completely wrong imho but I would not want to be funding her vacations, shopping sprees, etc.

[Gettintired76]

That was quote unquote back child support (Jan, Feb, Mar and April), buying groceries, putting gas in her car because "her husband wont give her any money", buying stuff for the kids, and entertainment for the kids, as well as paying her phone and cable/internet.

[Gettintired76]

And Im the one being charged with neglect go figure.

[Poison Ivy]

Is there a court order for child support?

[Gettintired76]

No she refused to involve the court, refuse to even answer my custody petition.

[Gettintired76]

There may very well be one soon though here they can order no contact and still force child support which you know I dont mind paying it, I helped bring them into this world after all.

[Poison Ivy]

It is good to support your children. I suggest that you ask your lawyers whether you should continue making the payments when there isn't an order in effect. If they say "yes, keep paying," perhaps you could come up with an amount to pay that is based on something other than "whatever she asks for."

[escapingman]

I feel for you GT76, I am worried I will end up in a similar situation. Absolutely understandable you get drunk at times, I do as well as that's to only way to cope at times. Not great but we are only humans.

Good luck with everything.

[Gettintired76]

I just keep hearing my baby begging not to say goodbye and my ex swearing it didn't happen that way. Its killing me it really is. What can happen to my ex for breaking no contact? I tried to leave it as can be seen and then she would throw the no contact at me and the leave her alone then keep going for 20 more texts. Escalating to more and more abusive attitudes and language until accusing me of mind games until I finally had to sign off and not even look at messenger?

[square]

It is good to support your children. I suggest that you ask your lawyers whether you should continue making the payments when there isn't an order in effect. If they say "yes, keep paying," perhaps you could come up with an amount to pay that is based on something other than "whatever she asks for."

Do you or anyone else have ideas on how to manage the manipulation?

The ex will tell GT they don't have money for food ir the Internet is shut off and his son can't do schoolwork or any number of urgent needs.

GT then feels obligated to help out so his kids don't pay the price.

Then ex can just use any money she has on whatever and know GT is always good for groceries or whatever sob story. And her husband does not need to support them at all.