worried about making friends

[rothjr3]

Hi.

I am new to this group. My mom has BPD. I have just begun to learn about how the environment I grew up in affected who I am and I may not have been able to escape what was my childhood.

One of the many things i struggle with is friendships. I don't trust myself or others. I expect to be hurt or let down and somehow believe I deserve to be. My feelings get hurt and it makes me want to isolate myself.

I pray that this new job that begins next month can be different. I hope I can walk into it believing (even if I have to fake it) that I have something to offer others. thank

[Starboard Song]

Many of us here understand.

The top line of my signature are the resources that helped my wife the most. These aren't tactical books about personality disorders. They are about joy, acceptance, love, and optimism. They are about how all of us can be our best selves.

Please try the first 50 pages of Radical Acceptance, soon.

[Amy-Rose]

I completely get that because I had to overcome trust issues in the past. Maybe try going in gently and with boundaries. Don't look to make friends. Look to make healthy relationships on a light level. See how things for for a month or so and pay attention, use your critical eye and listen to your gut and red flags. Looking back at my toxic relationship there were red flags right from the get go and I missed and dismissed them. Friendships takes years to build so don't dive in too deeply with someone you barely know.