Evil sister

[ambivalent1]

I have a sister I never did anything to who absolutely hates me.  She used to send me nasty Facebook messages and emails saying crazy things.  Eventually I blocked her on Facebook and she sent me an email saying no one around her wanted to talk to me.  This included my niece and nephew.  My nephew barely knows me and my niece never met me.  Also, they are children and don't have time hate me. She said it purely to cause pain.
For awhile before that, she was telling me she didn't want me to have contact with her children because I spent time in jail for drug possession.  I have never been in jail and don't use drugs.  At the time I was seeing a therapist and I told him I thought my sister might be seriously mentally ill because of this strange accusation.  He shrugged it off and seemed to think she just wasn't the nicest person.
At another point my mother asked her why I couldn't see my niece and nephew and she said it was because I'm "psychotic."  Again, I've never shown any signs of mental illness. 
I don't know if it's hate or mental illness or some kind of weird combination of both.  All I know is I wish she had never been in my life.

[notrightinthehead]

From what you wrote, she sounds like a disturbed person. How are you coping with the situation?

[Jolie40]

yes, I was recently shocked by the hate spewed at me on a phone call with sibling

she went on and on including things from the past
she was upset that husband & I took our child on vacation at Christmas instead of spending Christmas day with extended family (over 10 yrs ago)
so apparently, we're not allowed to take vacation when we want to with our child
then she hung up on me

ambivalent.....some siblings do have problems & project their own issues onto us
it's not right
I decided enough was enough & I'm not calling her anymore
don't need that hate & stress in my life

[moglow]

Ambivalent1, I'm firmly of the opinion that evil is as evil does. We all sometimes lash out in anger or frustration now and again. For us it's venting and it's over. So called "normal" people recognize we're out of line then apologize and regroup going forward. But holding on to that ugliness and blowing it all out of proportion, making crap up to justify that anger, spewing it all over people repeatedly with no apparent attempt to rein it in or change? It's deliberate and there seems to be a glee/enjoyment in it. That, to me, constitutes evil. The INTENT is the evil in my eyes.

My best guess is your sister had expectations that she never voiced, or possibly they were completely unreasonable whether voiced or not. I've experienced that with my mother and what you describe - the hate and venom, the lies, the projections of "no one wants to talk to you," the derogatory comments to you and others at your expense etc - that's all mother too. It's like she feels she has to justify the ugliness and does it in whatever way occurs at the time. And then she wonders why I'm distant, don't visit, rarely make any contact at all any more. Why would I?

I say all that so you know you're not alone. It may well be that as they get older, the niece and nephew reach out to you. They're trapped to all intents and purposes, they don't have a way out and their only source of information is her. They may be all too aware that their best bet is to play along to get along as best they can. They'll unfortunately buy into some of it just not knowing any better. NONE of that is on you or a reflection of you in any way. It's parental [familial?] alienation, actually - and it's evil at the core.