Reading 2 books - The Disease to Please and Conquering Shame and Codependency

[hhaw]

I don't know why I find it so difficult to read these days, but I do and these books haven't made it any easier.

Sometims it feels like the authors were THERE in the rooms with me during my childhood..... very draining and so I go back and forth betwixt and between the two, experiencing one existential moment after another.

This means I'm in new territory pretty often.

This means  I'm doing my best to cotinue practicing lessons and strategies along with taking on board new information. 

The good thing is.....  dots are connecting themselves and I've being tossed into the stratosphere, miles away from my pebbles.  I have a pretty consistent view of my causes, conditions AND my latest PDs AREN't among causes I identify.  Not at all.

I'm lookingn at myself, my childhood, my coping strategies and how my subconscious believed I WAS my coping stratetgies.

Holy guacomole...... PDs in our adult lives are SYMPTOMS!

I know they feeeeeel like THE PROBLEMS, but I really think that's just the view we suffer and our perceptions.

With some distance...... I see how I attracted dysfunctional people and relationshionships and, honestly, I sort of understood that early on BUT I went out of my way second marriage to choose someone I didn't feel any sparks with.  In fact, I brushed him off and celebrated with my roomate afterwards. 

My terrible marriages and bad picker is about me and my coping strategies from childhood.  It's interesting to have done the work to view most of this sans judgment, but it's an exhausting time.

I'm not likely going to be poting much, bc I'm learning so much AND I don't seen much practical use in posting like the PDs are the problems. 

They're
just
symptoms.

Some are dangous, expensive, scary and abusive, but we always had to power to avoid them..... we've been sabotaged by the ways we kept ourselves safe as children..... and that's how I see it right now.

Not saying anyone will get mch out of these books... just saying the foundation I have with a good Trauma Informed Therapist is clicking and I'm where I'm supposed to be right now.

Exhausted but feeling calm and joyful, more than not, with more ease and consistency.

YES

[notrightinthehead]

I have come to a similar conclusion. I struggle with 'The body keeps score' and I am a fast reader. I would be interested if you tell us more about the content of the books.