The push for ‘forgiveness‘ by the church

[olivegirl]

No Contact has made it easier for me to forgive my malignant narc mother and sociopathic father.

I feel peace and I feel safe now that I do not communicate with them in any way.

Even low contact brought up feelings of high anxiety, anger, deep hurt, humiliation.

Now I no longer look over my shoulder, hypervigilant that my toxic parents have smeared me again or trying to again financially exploit me.

I can just focus on gratitude and self-care.

Whether I choose to forgive or not is between God and me.  And the path to forgiveness has made my faith stronger.

[Call Me Cordelia]

This is a traditional list of nine ways to be accessory to another's sin. I found it in an old book I'm using for homeschooling, but I've seen it other places too, old prayer books and examinations of conscience and such. We are all affected by other people's sins, whether we are directly harmed or not. And our response cannot be truly neutral either. But it seemed especially pertinent to this discussion today:

By counsel
By command
By consent
By provocation
By praise or flattery
By concealment
By partaking
By silence
By defense of the ill done

That last one is a kicker. Anything that smacks of minimization of harm, DARVO, "Don't rock the boat" syndrome, anything in the self-serving denial category, gives that person some culpability in the sin of the abuser. That's a big deal. It made me stop in my tracks today. The Lord truly does care for his little ones.

[The_Inversed_Sight]

This is a traditional list of nine ways to be accessory to another's sin. I found it in an old book I'm using for homeschooling, but I've seen it other places too, old prayer books and examinations of conscience and such. We are all affected by other people's sins, whether we are directly harmed or not. And our response cannot be truly neutral either. But it seemed especially pertinent to this discussion today:

By counsel
By command
By consent
By provocation
By praise or flattery
By concealment
By partaking
By silence
By defense of the ill done

That last one is a kicker. Anything that smacks of minimization of harm, DARVO, "Don't rock the boat" syndrome, anything in the self-serving denial category, gives that person some culpability in the sin of the abuser. That's a big deal. It made me stop in my tracks today. The Lord truly does care for his little ones.

I love this list! Do you perhaps know the name of the book you found it in? It sounds like a fascinating read

[Call Me Cordelia]

It's in The New Roman Missal edited by Father Lasance.