Sadness

[CordyMcFae]

Hi all,

I'm lost. I feel like I woke up somewhere else in the universe far away from my already uncomfortable bed, and I don't know how I'm surviving without a spacesuit or how to get back to reality. He is highly familiar with NPD and other diagnoses, but self reflection has failed him, and I am the not so cherished wife who can't get anything right.

He spins tales of malintent, ostensibly knowing just what awful things I've been thinking and harmful actions I'm trying to take. The reality is I've loved him, and while I've experienced resentment at outrageous accusations and attempted to carefully correct misunderstandings, it's all for nothing.

Learning doesn't take place, and whenever he looks back at the catalog of my "misdeeds" (he frequently engages in retrospectives), his original perspective is intact. I've compromised so much of myself to meet his ever changing rubric, and it's not good enough. I told myself I would never be treated like this by my husband, and I too have adjusted my rubric for acceptable behavior towards me. There's so much more, but I needed to finally express myself to a community that gets what I'm going through. Thank you for letting me share.

[bloomie]

Hi and welcome to Out of the FOG. I am really glad you reached out to this community of fellow travelers. It sounds like things have become very difficult in your marriage and that possibly you have reached a saturation point.

Sharing in a community like this one, where people get it on a level not often found, can be a great support and encouragement. I hope you find that to be true for you as you spend time here. 

Take some time to read through the toolbox and resources at the drop down menus above and when  you are ready, join the conversations taking place all over the forum boards.

I look forward to supporting you!

[SonofThunder]

Hello CordyMcFae,

Another warm welcome to Out of the FOG!  Im sorry you feel sad and lost and that you cannot seem to meet the expanding expectations of your partner. 

I second Bloomie's recommendations and look forward to reading more about your experiences. You are not alone. See you around the boards.

SoT

[CordyMcFae]

Thank you both for your kind words and suggestions, I needed this. I am truly isolated and alone, and it helps to say what I feel and not be mocked and sneered at for merely existing.

[notrightinthehead]

It definitely helps to break the silence. You have found a good place here. See you around the boards.

[sunshine702]

Oh homey I can relate to the not so cherished wife who can't do anything right.

Navigating space wilderness yep

Welcome