There are a number of terms and abbreviations that you will encounter on this site and on our support forum. Here are some of the more commonly used terms:
The 3 "C's" - The 3 "C's" serve as a reminder to victim's of abuse that "I didn't Cause it, I can't Cure it and I can't Control it. Click Here for More Info on the 3 "C's".
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Abandonment - Short for "Fear of Abandonment".
Fear of abandonment and irrational jealousy is a phobia, sometimes exhibited by people with personality disorders, that they are in imminent danger of being rejected, discarded or replaced at the whim of a person who is close to them. Click Here for More Info on Fear of Abandonment.
Abusive Cycle -
The Abusive Cycle describes the characteristic rotation between destructive and constructive behavior that typically exists in dysfunctional relationships and dysfunctional families. Click Here for More Info on the Abusive Cycle.
ad litem - usually refers to Guardian ad litem - A representative appointed by a court to represent a child in a custody case. The Latin term ad litem literally means "for the trial" or "for the proceeding". Click Here for more info on Guardian ad Litem's.
Adult Children -
An adult child is a term commonly used to describe any grown adult who was exposed to emotional, physical or sexual abuse as a child.
Click Here for More Info about Adult Children.
AFCH - Adult Family Care Home. A private home owned by an individual licensed by the state to provide supervision to mentally disabled adults.
Aggression -
Raging, Violence and Impulsive Aggression are unprovoked verbal or emotional attacks or elevations of a dispute, sometimes accompanied by violence or the destruction of property, which threaten the security or safety of another individual - or violates their personal boundaries.
Click Here for More Information on Violence, Raging & Impulsive Aggression
ALF - Assisted Living Facility - A type of state-run group care home.
Alienation -
Alienation means interfering with, or cutting a person off from, relationships with others. This can be done by manipulating the attitudes and behaviors of the victim or of the people with whom they come in contact. The victim's relationships with others may be sabotaged through verbal pressure, threats, diversions, distortion campaigns and systems of rewards and punishments. Click Here for More Info on Alienation.
"Always" & "Never" Statements -
"Always" & "Never" Statements are statements containing the words "always" or "never". They are commonly used but rarely true. Click Here for More Info on Always & Never Statements.
Amygdala -
The Amygdala is a small region of the brain which plays a key role in emotional regulation, emotional memory and responses to emotional stimuli.Click Here for More Information on the Amygdala.
Anger -
Anger is what you feel when you don't get what you think you deserve. Non-PD's often feel a sense of anger over past abuses, an uncertain future outlook, unequal burden-sharing and persistent denial of their personal needs. Click Here to Read More about Anger.
Anger Management - Anger Management is a term that describes a broad array of approaches that are on offer to assist an individual in reducing the intensity of their angry feelings or to control their outward expressions of anger. Click Here to Learn More about Anger Management.
A Streetcar Named Desire - A Streetcar Named Desire is a is a 1947 play written by Tennessee Williams, later adapted for film, which tells the story of a woman who displays histrionic and borderline traits, who goes to live with her codependent sister and her narcissistic husband. Click Here for More Info on A Streetcar Named Desire.
Axis - The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual (DSM-IV) uses a 5-axis system to categorize clinical psychology. Click Here for More info on Personality Disorders Personality disorders are included in Axis II. The five DSM axes are:
Axis I: Major mental disorders, clinical disorders, developmental disorders and learning disabilities.
Axis II: Underlying pervasive or personality conditions & mental retardation.
Axis III: Medical conditions contributing to the disorder.
Axis IV: Psychosocial and environmental factors contributing to the disorder.
Axis V: Global Assessment of Functioning on a scale from 0 to 100.
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Baiting & Picking Fights -
Baiting is the practice of generating a provocative action or statement for the purpose of obtaining an angry, aggressive or emotional response from another person. Click Here for More Info on Baiting & Picking Fights.
Blaming-
Blaming is the practice of identifying a person or people responsible for creating a problem, rather than identifying ways of dealing with the problem. Click Here for More Info On Blaming.
BM – Biological Mother
Borderline - Having, or exhibiting the characteristics of Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). Click Here for More Info on BPD.
Borderline Personality Disorder - A mental illness which afflicts an estimated 2% of the population. Click Here for More Info on BPD.
Boundaries -
Boundaries are guidelines, rules or limits that a person creates to identify for themselves what are reasonable, safe and permissable ways for other people to behave around them and how they will respond when someone steps outside those limits. Click Here for More Info about Setting Boundaries.
BP (1) - A person who has Borderline Personality Disorder or who appears to exhibit some of its symptoms. Click Here for More Info on BPD.
BPD411 - http://www.BPD411.org - An Internet-based information service and support group whose purpose is to provide a safe environment for the education, healing and recovery of persons who are in a relationship with someone who exhibits traits of Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). Click Here for More Info on BPD.
BPGF - BP Girlfriend - a girlfriend who suffers from BPD or appears to exhibit some of its symptoms. Click Here for More Info on BPD.
BPH - BP Husband - a husband who suffers from BPD or appears to exhibit some of its symptoms. Click Here for More Info on BPD.
BPSO - Borderline Personality Significant Other - a spouse or partner who suffers from BPD or appears to exhibit some of its symptoms. Click Here for More Info on BPD.
Bullying - Bullying is any systematic action of hurting a person from a position of relative physical, social, economic or emotional strength. Click Here for More Info on Bullying.
Bunny Boiling - Bunny Boiling is a reference to an iconic scene in the movie "Fatal Attraction" in which the main character Alex, who suffers from Borderline Personality Disorder, kills the family's pet rabbit and boils it on the stove. Bunny Boiling has become a popular reference to how people with BPD sometimes behave destructively towards treasured possessions of the people closest to them. . Click Here for More Info about Fatal Attraction.
Bupropion - a type of antidepressant medication. Common brand names for Bupropion include Wellbutrin or Zyban. Click Here for more info on Bupropion
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Catastrophizing -
Catastrophizing is the habit of automatically assuming a "worst case scenario" and inappropriately characterizing minor or moderate problems or issues as catastrophic events. Click Here for More Info on Catastrophizing.
CBT - Cognitive Behavioral Therapy - a therapy technique which focuses on recognizing and improving a patient’s day to day feelings and decisions. Click Here for More Info on CBT
CE - Custody Evaluator or Custody Evaluation - A Custody Evaluation is a procedure ordered by a court in a custody case in which a professional is appointed to recommend to the judge which custody arrangement is in the best interest of the minor children.Click Here for More Info on Custody Evaluations
Charlie Brown –
Charlie Brown is the lead character in Charles M. Schulz's classic "Peanuts" cartoons who is generally portrayed as feeling insecure and seeking acceptance. Charlie Brown's character contrasts with the somewhat narcissistic character of Lucy and their relationship is sometimes used to illustrate the relationship between personality-disordered and non-personality-disordered people.Click Here for More Information on Charlie Brown.
Chaos Manufacture -
Chaos Manufacture is the practice of unnecessarily creating or maintaining an environment of risk, destruction, confusion or mess. Click Here for More Info on Chaos Manufacture.
Cheating - Cheating is sharing a romantic or intimate relationship with somebody when you are already committed to a monogamous relationship with someone else.Click Here for More Info on Cheating.
Chosen – Chosen's are people who are in a marriage, partnership, romantic relationship or friendship with a person who suffers from a personality disorder. They are called "chosen" because they made a choice to enter into that relationship. Chosen's include husbands, wives, partners, boyfriends, girlfriends, and friends of a person who suffers from a personality disorder. . Click Here for More Information on Chosen Relationships.
Chosen Relationship – Chosen's are people who are in a marriage, partnership, romantic relationship or friendship with a person who suffers from a personality disorder. They are called "chosen" because they made a choice to enter into that relationship. Chosen's include husbands, wives, partners, boyfriends, girlfriends, and friends of a person who suffers from a personality disorder. Click Here for More Information on Chosen Relationships.
Clarity - Moments of Clarity are spontaneous, temporary periods when a person with a personality disorder is able to see beyond their own world view and can, for a brief period, understand, acknowledge, articulate and begin to make amends for their dysfunctional behavior.Click Here for More Information on Moments of Clarity
Cluster A Personality Disorder – The DSM-IV Diagnostic and Statistical Manual Categorizes Personality Disorders into 3 Clusters. Cluster A (odd or eccentric disorders) includes Paranoid personality disorder, Schizoid personality disorder & Schizotypal personality disorder. Click Here for More Information on Personality Disorders.
Cluster B Personality Disorder – The DSM-IV Diagnostic and Statistical Manual Categorizes Personality Disorders into 3 Clusters. Cluster B (dramatic, emotional, or erratic disorders) includes Antisocial personality disorder, Borderline personality disorder, Histrionic personality disorder & Narcissistic personality disorder. Click Here for More Information on Personality Disorders.
Cluster C Personality Disorder – The DSM-IV Diagnostic and Statistical Manual Categorizes Personality Disorders into 3 Clusters. Cluster C (anxious or fearful disorders) includes Avoidant personality disorder, Dependent personality disorder & Obsessive-compulsive personality disorder. Click Here for More Information on Personality Disorders.
Codependency - A Codependency is a relationship in which an otherwise mentally-healthy person is controlled or manipulated by another who is affected by an addiction or mental illness. Click Here for More Information on Codependency.
Codependency -
A Codependency is a relationship in which an otherwise mentally-healthy person is controlled or manipulated by another who is affected by an addiction or mental illness. Click Here for More Info on Codependency.
Codependent - a person who is in a relationship in which they are controlled or manipulated by another who is affected by a pathological condition or an addiction. Click Here for More Info on Codependency.
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy - Cognitive Behavioral Therapy is a therapy technique which focuses on recognizing and improving a patient’s day to day feelings and decisions. Click Here for More Info on CBT.
Cognitive Dissonance -
Cognitive Dissonance is a psychological term for the discomfort that most people feel when they encounter information which contradicts their existing set of beliefs or values. People who suffer from personality disorders often experience cognitive dissonance when they are confronted with evidence that their actions have hurt others or have contradicted their stated morals.
Click Here for More Info on Cognitive Dissonance.
Comorbidity - Comorbidity is a psychological term used to describe the occurrence of more than one diagnosis in a single patient. Comorbidity is common in the diagnosis of psychological disorders.Click Here for Information & Statistics on Comorbidity.
Compulsive Liar –
Compulsive lying is another term for lying out of habit, without much regard for the consequences to others. A compulsive liar is someone who habitually lies. . Click Here for More Information about Lies, Liars & Lying.
Compulsive Lying –
Compulsive lying is another term for lying out of habit, without much regard for the consequences to others. A compulsive liar is someone who habitually lies. . Click Here for More information about Lies, Liars & Lying.
"Control-Me" Syndrome - "Control-Me" Syndrome describes a tendency that some abuse victims and some people who suffer from personality disorders have to nurture relationships with people who have a controlling narcissistic, antisocial or "acting-out" nature. Click Here to Learn More about "Control-Me" Syndrome.
Conscience –
Conscience is an innate sense of what is morally or ethically right and wrong, often used as a guide of what is appropriate behavior. A weak conscience or a lack of conscience is characteristic in a number of personality disorders.. Click Here for More information about Lack of Conscience.
CPS - Children's Protective Services - Government agency in several US States which investigates and acts upon reports of child abuse.
CPTSD or C-PTSD - Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - A condition that results from chronic or prolonged exposure to emotional trauma or abuse. C-PTSD better describes the effects of chronic emotional trauma than the more commonly diagnosed Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD).
"Cum Hoc Ergo Propter Hoc" Fallacy -
"Cum hoc ergo propter hoc" is Latin for "with this, therefore becuase of this" or, in other words "A and B happen at the same time, therefore A must be causing B to happen". The "cum hoc ergo propter hoc" fallacy is a common mistake in the diagnosis and treatment of medical and psychological conditions.Click Here for More Info on The "Cum Hoc Ergo Propter Hoc" Fallacy.
Custody Evaluation - A Custody Evaluation is a procedure ordered by a court in a custody case in which a professional is appointed to recommend to the judge which custody arrangement is in the best interest of the minor children.Click Here for More Info on Custody Evaluations.
Custody Evaluator -
A Custody Evaluator is a professional (commonly an attorney, Guardian ad-litem or social worker) appointed by a judge to perform a Custody Evaluation.
Click Here for More Info on Custody Evaluations.
DBT - DBT, or Dialectical Behavioral Therapy, is a psychosocial treatment developed for patients with borderline personality disorder which combines intensive individual and group therapy.Click Here for More Info on DBT
DCF - Department of Children and Families - Government agency in several US States which investigates and acts upon reports of child abuse.
DD - Dear Daughter
DEAR - Describe, Express (what you want), Assert (the benefit) and Reinforce (the benefit). - The DEAR acronym was developed by pioneering BPD Researcher Dr. Marsha Linehan as an effective way to ask for something you want.
Denial -
Denial is believing or imagining that some factual reality, circumstance, feeling or memory does not exist or did not happen. Click Here for More Info about Denial.
Dependency -
Dependency is an inappropriate and chronic reliance by one adult individual on another for their health, subsistence, decision making or personal and emotional well- being. Click Here for More Info on Dependency.
Depression - When you feel sadder than you think you should, for longer than you think you should - but still can't seem to break out of it - that's depression. Click Here for More Info on Depression.
Distortion Campaigns -
False accusations, distortion campaigns & smear campaigns are patterns of unwarranted or exaggerated criticisms which occur when a personality disordered individual tries to feel better about themselves by putting down someone else - usually a family member, spouse, partner, friend or colleague. Click Here for More Info on False Accusations & Distortion Campaigns.
Domestic Theft - Domestic theft is consuming or taking control of a resource or asset belonging to (or shared with) a family member, partner or spouse without first obtaining their approval. Click Here for More Info on Domestic Theft
Dopamine - dopamine acts as a neurotransmitter in the brain. Increased levels of the neurotransmitters - serotonin, norepinephrine, and dopamine - has been found to reduce depression. This is the basis for most modern antidepressant medications.
Dishrag Dad - A Dishrag Dad is a father who lacks appropriate boundaries, thus enabling a mother with a personality disorder to abuse him and the children. Click Here for More Common Behaviors of Non-PD's.
Domestic Theft -
Domestic theft is consuming or taking control of a resource or asset belonging to (or shared with) a family member, partner or spouse without first obtaining their approval. Click Here for More Info on Domestic Theft.
Drama Major - A Drama Major or Drama Queen is a person who inappropriately draws attention to themselves by behaving in an over-the-top flamboyant, combative or explosive, manner or by creating chaos. Often associated with Histrionic Personality Disorder (HPD). Click Here for More Information on Drama Majors & Drama Queens.
Drama Queen - A Drama Major or Drama Queen is a person who inappropriately draws attention to themselves by behaving in an over-the-top flamboyant, combative or explosive, manner or by creating chaos. Often associated with Histrionic Personality Disorder (HPD). Click Here for More Information on Drama Majors & Drama Queens.
Dr. Jekyll & Mr. Hyde -
The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde is an 1886 book written by Robert Louis Stevenson which has been adapted into numerous movies and stage productions. The story portrays the mild-mannered Doctor Henry Jekyll, who unleashes his monstrous alternate identity, Edward Hyde, by taking a chemical potion.Click Here for More Information about Dr. Jekyll & Mr. Hyde
DS - Dear Son
DSM, DSM-IV, DSM-IV-TR - Diagnostic & Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders- The American Psychiatric Association's published criteria for mental disorders. Currently in it's 4th revision (DSM-IV) with an additional Text Revision (DSM-IV-TR).
DSS - Department of Social Services - Government agency in several US States which investigates and acts upon reports of child abuse.
DW - Dear Wife
Dysfunctional - Unhealthy, characterized by abuse or conflict, as in a dysfunctional family or dysfunctional relationship.
Dysthymia - Dysthymia is a psychological term for prolonged depression, generally lasting 2 or more years. See More Info on Depression.
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EDD - Emotional Dysregulation Disorder - A Personality Disorder, formerly known as Borderline Personality Disorder. Click Here for More Info on EDD
EMDR -
Emotional Blackmail describes the use of a system of threats and punishments on a person by someone close to them in an attempt to control their behaviors.
Click Here for More Info on EMDR.
Emotional Blackmail -
Emotional Blackmail describes the use of a system of threats and punishments on a person by someone close to them in an attempt to control their behaviors.
Click Here for More Info on Emotional Blackmail.
Emotional Dysregulation Disorder - Another name for Emotional Regulation Disorder (ERD) or Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) Click Here for More Info on ERD
Emotional Elevator -
The Emotional Elevator is a way of describing how people who suffer from personality disorders and those closest to them sometimes take a fast track down to different levels of emotional maturity. Click Here for More Info on Riding the Emotional Elevator.
Emotional Regulation Disorder (ERD) - A Personality Disorder - formerly known as Borderline Personality Disorder. Click Here for More Info on ERD.
Emotionally Unstable Personality Disorder (EUPD) - Another name for Emotional Regulation Disorder (ERD) or Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) Click Here for More Info on EUPD.
Emotion-Impulse Regulation Disorder (EIRD) - Another name for Emotional Regulation Disorder (ERD) or Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) Click Here for More Info on EIRD
Emotion Intensity Disorder (EID) - Another name for Emotional Regulation Disorder (ERD) or Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) Click Here for More Info on EID.
Enabler - A person who habitually attempts to placate another by sacrificing their own or other family members needs in a misguided attempt to keep the peace. Click Here for More Info on Enabling.
Enabling - The tendency of Non's to attempt to placate someone by sacrificing their own or other family members needs in a misguided attempt to keep the peace. Click Here for More Info on Enabling.
Engulfment -
Engulfment is an unhealthy and overwhelming level of attention and dependency on a spouse, partner or family member, which comes from imagining or believing that one exists only within the context of that relationship. Click Here for More Info on Engulfment.
Entitlement - Entitlement or a 'Sense of Entitlement' is an unrealistic, unmerited or inappropriate expectation of favorable living conditions and favorable treatment at the hands of others. Click Here for More Info on Entitlement.
ERD - Emotional Regulation Disorder - A Personality Disorder, formerly known as Borderline Personality Disorder. Click Here for More Info on ERD.
EUPD - Emotionally Unstable Personality Disorder - Another name for Emotional Regulation Disorder (ERD) or Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) Click Here for More Info on EUPD.
ETOH - Alcohol (Shorthand form of Ethanol, or Ethyl Alcohol)
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Facing The Facts - Support Site for the family and relationship partners of individuals with BPD http://www.facing-the-facts.net
False Accusations -
False accusations, distortion campaigns & smear campaigns are patterns of unwarranted or exaggerated criticisms which occur when a personality disordered individual tries to feel better about themselves by putting down someone else - usually a family member, spouse, partner, friend or colleague. Click Here for More Info on False Accusations & Distortion Campaigns.
Fatal Attraction - Fatal Attraction is a 1987 Movie Thriller starring Glenn Close & Michael Douglas about Dan Gallagher, a New York Lawyer (played by Michael Douglas) who is stalked by Alex Forrest (played by Glenn Close) with whom he has had an affair. The story portrays Alex's increasingly unstable behavior as a result of having Borderline Personality Disorder and feeling abandoned by Dan. Click Here for More Info about Fatal Attraction.
Favoritism -
Favoritism is the practice of systematically giving positive, preferential treatment to one child, subordinate or associate among a group of peers. Click Here for More Info on Favoritism.
Fear of Abandonment -
Fear of abandonment and irrational jealousy is a phobia, sometimes exhibited by people with personality disorders, that they are in imminent danger of being rejected, discarded or replaced at the whim of a person who is close to them. Click Here for More Info on Fear of Abandonment.
50% Rule – The 50% Rule says that we are responsible for 50% of the things that happen in any relationship we share with a person who suffers from a personality disorder.Click Here for More Info on the 50% Rule.
51% Rule – The 51% Rule says that we need to consider our own needs just a little more that those of others in order to be able to help them effectively. Click Here for More Info on the 51% Rule.
FIL – Father In Law
Fix-It Syndrome -
Fix-It Syndrome is when a non-personality-disordered individual frequently puts themselves in the position of a caretaker who is responsible for compensating for their personality-disordered loved-one's behaviors, cleaning up any messes created by their actions and fixing any problems arising from their mental health issues. Click Here for More Info on Fix-It Syndrome.
Fleas - When a Non begins imitating or emulating some of the disordered behavior of a loved one or family member with a personality disorder this is sometimes referred to as "getting fleas". Click Here For More Information on Fleas.
FOG - Fear, Obligation & Guilt. The acronym FOG, for Fear, Obligation and Guilt, was first coined by Susan Forward & Donna Frazier in Emotional Blackmail and describes feelings that a person often has when in a relationship with someone who suffers from a personality disorder. Our website, Out of the FOG, is named after this acronym.Click Here For More Information on FOG - Fear Obligation & Guilt.
Forgetness -
Forgetness is inappropriate forgiveness. Forgetness is forgiving someone who does something wrong when it would be more appropriate - and ultimately better for both parties - to hold them accountable for their own actions.
Click Here for More Info on Forgetness.
FOO - Family of Origin – The family that a person was born or raised in.
Frivolous Litigation and Frivolous Lawsuits - Frivolous Litigation and Frivolous Lawsuits are methods of withholding support, harassing or prolonging conflict by bringing unsubstantiated accusations, meritless appeals or diversionary process into a relationship or a former relationship using the court system as a proxy. Click Here for More Info On Frivolous Litigation & Frivolous Lawsuits.
GAD - Generalized Anxiety Disorder- An Axis I Anxiety Disorder described in the American Psychiatric Association Diagnostic & Statistical Manual (DSM-IV-TR)
GAL - Guardian ad litem -
A Guardian ad litem is a professional (often an attorney or social worker) appointed by a court to represent a child's interests in a legal proceeding or custody dispute. The Latin term ad litem literally means "for the trial" or "for the proceeding"Click Here for More info on Guardian ad litem's
Gaslighting -
Gaslighting is the practice of brainwashing or convincing a mentally healthy individual that they are going insane or that their understanding of reality is mistaken or false. The term "Gaslighting" is based on the 1944 MGM movie “Gaslight”. Click Here for More Info on Gaslighting & the movie "Gaslight".
GF - Girlfriend
Girl, Interrupted -
Girl, Interrupted is a 1999 Columbia Pictures movie which chronicles the experiences of a teenage girl with Borderline Personality Disorder, who is admitted to a mental health institution after attempting suicide. Click Here for More info on Girl, Interrupted.
Guardian ad litem -
A Guardian ad litem is a professional (often an attorney or social worker) appointed by a court to represent a child's interests in a legal proceeding or custody dispute. The Latin term ad litem literally means "for the trial" or "for the proceeding"Click Here for More info on Guardian ad litem's.
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H - Abbreviation for Husband
Haggis - Haggis is a traditional Scottish dish made from parts of a sheep that you have to be insane to eat. Click Here for More info on Haggis.
HAP -
Hostile Aggressive Parenting (HAP), also known as Parental Alienation, is a term which is used to describe the process of one divorced parent inappropriately influencing a child into thinking that the other parent is bad, evil or worthless. Click Here for More Info on Hostile Aggressive Parenting and Parental Alienation.
Harassment - Harrassment is any sustained or chronic pattern of unwelcome behavior from one individual to another. Click Here for More Info on Harassment.
Helen's World of BPD Resources - Resource Site with thousands of articles on Borderline Personality Disorder http://www.bpdresources.com
Hermit - One of the four BPD types (Hermit, Waif, Queen Witch) as defined in Christine Ann Lawson's ground breaking book "Understanding the Borderline Mother". The Hermit describes the mother who withdraws from the world from fear of being hurt. Click Here for More Information on "Understanding The Borderline Mother"
Histrionic -
Histrionic means having a pattern of excessively dramatic, emotional, over-reactive or attention-seeking behavior, an excessive need for approval or inappropriate seductiveness. The term comes from the Latin for "actor". Click Here for information on Histrionic Personality Disorder (HPD).
Histrionic Personality Disorder - .
Histrionic means having a pattern of excessively dramatic, emotional, over-reactive or attention-seeking behavior, an excessive need for approval or inappropriate seductiveness. The term comes from the Latin for "actor". Click Here for information on Histrionic Personality Disorder (HPD).
Histrionic Sabotage - Histrionic Sabotage is any action designed to hurt or damage the interests of another person or group for the purpose of drawing attention to oneself or to earn a reputation. Click Here for More Info on Sabotage.
Hoovers & Hoovering -
A Hoover is a metaphor, taken from the popular brand of vacuum cleaners, to describe how an abuse victim, trying to assert their own rights by leaving or limiting contact in a dysfunctional relationship gets "sucked back in" when the perpetrator temporarily exhibits improved or desirable behavior. Click Here for More Info on Hoovers & Hoovering.
Hot Penning -
Hot Penning is a technique of journaling where you rapidly write down whatever comes to mind on a topic without taking a break, stopping to think or slowing down to correct spelling & punctuation. Click Here for More Info on Hot Penning.
Hostile Aggressive Parenting -
Hostile Aggressive Parenting (HAP), also known as Parental Alienation, is a term which is used to describe the process of one divorced parent inappropriately influencing a child into thinking that the other parent is bad, evil or worthless. Click Here for More Info on Hostile Aggressive Parenting and Parental Alienation.
HPD - Histrionic Personality Disorder -
Histrionic means having a pattern of excessively dramatic, emotional, over-reactive or attention-seeking behavior, an excessive need for approval or inappropriate seductiveness. The term comes from the Latin for "actor". Click Here for information on Histrionic Personality Disorder (HPD). HPD is a mental illness characterized by histrionic behavior.
HPD (2) - A person who suffers from Histrionic personality disorder or appears to exhibit some of its symptoms. See HPD Description.
Hyper Vigilance - Hyper Vigilance is the practice of maintaining an unhealthy level of interest in the behaviors, comments, thoughts and interests of others. Click Here to Learn More about Hyper Vigilance.
Hypomanic Episode - A distinct period of persistently elevated, expansive, or irritable mood, lasting throughout at least 4 days, that is clearly different from the usual non-depressed mood, common in Bipolar II Disorder. Click Here for More Info on Bipolar Disorder.
Hysteria - Hysteria is inappropriate over-reaction to bad news or disappointments, which diverts attention away from the problem and towards the person who is having the reaction. Click Here for More Info on Hysteria.
ICD - International Classification of Diseases - World Health Organization (WHO) system for classifying physical and mental disorders of which ICD-10 is the most recent (1992).
Ideation - Ideation is a psychological term meaning thoughts and ideas. Most commonly used in the context of Suicidal Ideation.
Impulsive Aggression -
Raging, Violence and Impulsive Aggression are unprovoked verbal or emotional attacks or elevations of a dispute, sometimes accompanied by violence or the destruction of property, which threaten the security or safety of another individual - or violates their personal boundaries.
Click Here for More Information on Violence, Raging & Impulsive Aggression.
Impulsive Personality Disorder (IPD) - Another name for Emotional Regulation Disorder (ERD) or Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) as defined by the Chinese Society of Psychiatry's CCMD. Click Here for More Info on BPD.
Intermittent Reinforcement -
Intermittent Reinforcement is when rules, rewards or personal boundaries are handed out or enforced inconsistently and occasionally. This usually encourages another person to keep pushing until they get what they want from you without changing their own behavior. Click Here for More Info on Intermittent Reinforcement.
Invalidation -
The difference between blaming and shaming is that in blaming someone tells you that you did something bad, in shaming someone tells you that you are bad. Invalidation is a form of Shaming.Click Here for More Info on Invalidation & Shaming.
IPD - Impulsive Personality Disorder - Another name for Emotional Regulation Disorder (ERD) or Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) as defined by the Chinese Society of Psychiatry's CCMD. Click Here for More Info on BPD.
IPDE - International Personality Disorder Examination - The IPDE is a standardized interview of 537 questions used for screening of candidates for personality disorders. The IPDE uses the DSM-IV-TR and ICD-10 criteria and includes a 77 question true/false pre-screener evaluation.
Isolation - Isolation from friends, family, peers and supportive communities is common among victims of abuse. Isolation is sometimes caused by a person who has a personality disorder who does not want someone close to them having close relationships with others. Isolation can also be self-imposed by abuse victims, who out of a sense of shame, fear, or guilt fear the consequences of what might happen if outsiders learn too much. Click Here for More Info on Isolation.
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Jealousy - Fear of abandonment and irrational jealousy is a phobia, sometimes exhibited by people with personality disorders, that they are in imminent danger of being rejected, discarded or replaced at the whim of a person who is close to them. - Click Here for More Information on Jealousy & Fear of Abandonment.
Jekyll & Hyde -
The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde is an 1886 book written by Robert Louis Stevenson which has been adapted into numerous movies and stage productions. The story portrays the mild-mannered Doctor Henry Jekyll, who unleashes his monstrous alternate identity, Edward Hyde, by taking a chemical potion.Click Here for More Information about Dr. Jekyll & Mr. Hyde
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Kansas - "The Wizard of Oz" is a 1944 movie starring Judy Garland which is sometimes used as a metaphor to describe the disconnect between the dissociated reality of the personality-disordered individual (Oz) and the real world experienced by the Non-PD (Kansas). The metaphor is based on the iconic phrase: "Toto - I've a feeling we're not in Kansas any more".Click Here for More Info and a clip from "The Wizard of Oz "
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L - Lawyer (an Attorney) -
An Attorney (or Lawyer) is a trained legal professional who represents or argues on behalf of a person's interests in court. Click Here for Information on Finding an Attorney.
Lack of Conscience - Conscience is an innate sense of what is morally or ethically right and wrong, often used as a guide of what is appropriate behavior. A weak conscience or a lack of conscience is characteristic in a number of personality disorders. Click Here for More Info on Lack of Conscience.
Lack of Object Constancy - Object Constancy is a psychological term used to describe the ability to think of other people or objects as "still there", even when they are out of your immediate field of vision. Object constancy is a developmental skill which most children develop at about age 2-3. A lack of object constancy is a symptom of some personality disorders. Click Here for More Info on Lack of Object Constancy.
Learned Helplessness - - Learned helplessness is when a person begins to believe they have no control over a situation, even when they actually do have the power to change their circumstances, leading them into an unneccessary state of depression, where initiative, action or investment is deemed futile. Click Here for Information on Learned Helplessness.
LC – Limited Contact – Curtailing most forms of non-essential correspondence, communication and personal contact with a disordered loved one or family member for one’s own protection.
Limited Contact – Curtailing most forms of non-essential correspondence, communication and personal contact with a disordered loved one or family member for one’s own protection.
Lose-Lose Scenarios - No-Win Scenarios and Lose-Lose Scenarios are situations commonly created by people who suffer from personality disorders where they present two bad options to someone close to them and pressure them into choosing between the two. This usually leaves the non-personality-disordered person with a "damned if you do and damned if you don't" feeling. Click Here for More Info on No-Win and Lose-Lose Scenarios.
Low Self-Esteem -
Low Self-Esteem is a common name for a negatively-distorted self-view which is inconsistent with reality. People who have low self-esteem often see themselves as unworthy of being successful in personal and professional settings and in social relationships. They may view their successes and their strenghts in a negative light and believe that others see them in the same way.As a result, they may develop an avoidance strategy to protect themselves from criticism. Click Here for a full Description of Low Self Esteem.
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Major Depressive Episode - A distinct period of depressed mood, loss of interest or pleasure lasting 2 weeks or more, common among people who suffer from Bipolar Disorder. Click Here for More Info on Bipolar Disorder.
Manic Episode - A distinct period of abnormally and persistently elevated, expansive, or irritable mood, lasting at least 1 week, common among people who suffer from Bipolar Disorder. Click Here for More Info on Bipolar Disorder.
MAOI - Monoamine Oxidase Inhibitor - a category of strong antidepressant medications, normally reserved for severe cases because of their associated side effects. Click Here for more info on MAOI's
MBP - Munchausen By Proxy -
Munchausen's Syndrome is a disorder in which an individual repeatedly fakes or exaggerates their own illness or medical symptoms in order to manipulate the attentions of medical professionals or personal caregivers. Munchausen By Proxy Syndrome (MBPS) or Munchausen's Syndrome By Proxy (MSBP) is a form of child abuse in which a parent systematically manufactures, fabricates or exaggerates the appearance of illness in a child in order to draw attention to themselves, elevate their own importance and manipulate the attentions of caregivers and medical professionals.
MBPS - Munchausen By Proxy Syndrome -
Munchausen's Syndrome is a disorder in which an individual repeatedly fakes or exaggerates their own illness or medical symptoms in order to manipulate the attentions of medical professionals or personal caregivers. Munchausen By Proxy Syndrome (MBPS) or Munchausen's Syndrome By Proxy (MSBP) is a form of child abuse in which a parent systematically manufactures, fabricates or exaggerates the appearance of illness in a child in order to draw attention to themselves, elevate their own importance and manipulate the attentions of caregivers and medical professionals.
Medium Chill – Maintaining a distant relationship with a family member and taking steps to protect oneself from being hurt when direct contact is unavoidable.
MHP - Mental Health Professional
MHW - Mental Health Ward
MIL - Mother In Law
Minnesota Multiphasic Personality Inventory (MMPI) - a psychological test commonly performed in custody evaluations to evaluate the psychological characteristics of the divorcing parents. See MMPI Info.
Mirroring -
Mirroring is a term which describes imitating or copying another person's characteristics, behaviors or traits. Click Here for More Info on Mirroring.
MMPI - Minnesota Multiphasic Personality Inventory - a psychological test commonly performed in custody evaluations to evaluate the psychological characteristics of the divorcing parents. See MMPI Info.
Moments Of Clarity -
Moments of Clarity are spontaneous, temporary periods when a person with a personality disorder is able to see beyond their own world view and can, for a brief period, understand, acknowledge, articulate and begin to make amends for their dysfunctional behavior.Click Here for More Info on Moments of Clarity
MPD (1) - Multiple Personality Disorder - old name for Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID). Click Here for More Info on MPD
Munchausen's and Munchausen by Proxy Syndrome (MBPS) -
Munchausen's Syndrome is a disorder in which an individual repeatedly fakes or exaggerates their own illness or medical symptoms in order to manipulate the attentions of medical professionals or personal caregivers. Munchausen By Proxy Syndrome (MBPS) or Munchausen's Syndrome By Proxy (MSBP) is a form of child abuse in which a parent systematically manufactures, fabricates or exaggerates the appearance of illness in a child in order to draw attention to themselves, elevate their own importance and manipulate the attentions of caregivers and medical professionals.Click Here for More Info on Munchausen's & Munchausen by Proxy Syndrome.
My Stuff/Your Stuff - My Stuff/Your Stuff is a thought technique of reminding yourself to separate what is really your responsibility, your concern and under your control and what is a personality-disordered individual's responsibility, concern and under their control. Click Here to Learn More about My Stuff/Your Stuff.
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NAMI - National Alliance on Mental Illness, the nation’s largest organization for people with mental illness and their families. NAMI operates a website www.nami.org, help line, education programs, support groups & advocacy.
Narcissism - Narcissism is a term used to describe a set of behaviors characterized by a pattern of grandiosity, self-centered focus, need for admiration, self-serving attitude and a lack of empathy or consideration for others. The name comes from the Greek Mythological Character Narcissus, who rejected love from others and fell in love with his own reflection in the water. These characteristics are common in people who suffer from Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD). Click Here for more Info on Narcissism & NPD.
Narcissist - A person who behaves with a pattern of selfishness, grandiosity, need for admiration, self-focus and a lack of empathy or consideration toward others. The name comes from the Greek Mythological Character Narcissus, who rejected love from others and fell in love with his own reflection in the water. See NPD Description
Narcissistic - Behavior characterized by a pattern of selfishness, grandiosity, need for admiration, self-focus and a lack of empathy or consideration toward others. The name comes from the Greek Mythological Character Narcissus, who rejected love from others and fell in love with his own reflection in the water. See NPD Description.
Narcissistic Personality Disorder - A mental illness characterized by pattern of grandiosity, need for admiration, and a lack of empathy or consideration toward others. See NPD Description.
Narcissistic Sabotage - Narcissistic Sabotage is any action designed to hurt, or damage the interests of another person or group for the purpose of making a direct, personal gain.Click Here for More Information on Sabotage.
National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) - US organization for people with mental illness and their families. NAMI operates a website www.nami.org, help line, education programs, support groups & advocacy.
National Education Alliance for Borderline Personality Disorder (NEA-BPD) - Organization formed to raise public awareness, provide education, promote research and enhance the quality of life of those affected by BPD. http://www.borderlinepersonalitydisorder.com/
National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH) - US Government-funded scientific organization dedicated to research focused on the understanding, treatment, and prevention of mental disorders and the promotion of mental health http://www.nimh.nih.gov/
NEA-BPD - National Education Alliance for Borderline Personality Disorder. Organization formed to raise public awareness, provide education, promote research and enhance the quality of life of those affected by BPD. http://www.borderlinepersonalitydisorder.com/
NC - No Contact -
Going "No Contact" means cutting off all forms of correspondence, communication and personal contact with a person who suffers from a personality disorder in order to protect yourself from recurring abuse. Click Here for More Info on Going "No Contact".
NIMH - National Institute of Mental Health - US Government-funded scientific organization dedicated to research focused on the understanding, treatment, and prevention of mental disorders and the promotion of mental healthhttp://www.nimh.nih.gov/
No Contact (NC) -
Going "No Contact" means cutting off all forms of correspondence, communication and personal contact with a person who suffers from a personality disorder in order to protect yourself from recurring abuse. Click Here for More Info on Going "No Contact".
Non -
A Non (or Non-PD) is any person who has a family member, or is in a relationship with, a person who suffers from a personality disorder.Click Here for More Information about Non's.
Non-BP - a person who cares about or is in a relationship with a person who suffers from Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). Click Here for More Information about Non's.
Non-Non - a person who is in a relationship with a Non. Typically, a Non-Non is a person who moves in with or marries a divorced or separated Non and inherits some of the issues of dealing with their personality-disordered ex-spouse or parent. Click Here for More Information about Non's.
Non-PD -
A Non (or Non-PD) is any person who has a family member, or is in a relationship with, a person who suffers from a personality disorder.Click Here for More Information about Non's.
Nook (1) - A support site for Non's which was the predecessor of this site. Closed in 2007.
Nook (3) - Another spin off site for Non's which was started after the shut-down of the original Nook. http://www.thenook4pds.com
Norepinephrine - norepinephrine acts as a neurotransmitter in the brain. Increased levels of the neurotransmitters - serotonin, norepinephrine, and dopamine - has been found to reduce depression. This is the basis for most modern antidepressant medications.
No-Win Scenarios - No-Win Scenarios and Lose-Lose Scenarios are situations commonly created by people who suffer from personality disorders where they present two bad options to someone close to them and pressure them into choosing between the two. This usually leaves the non-personality-disordered person with a "damned if you do and damned if you don't" feeling. Click Here for More Info on No-Win and Lose-Lose Scenarios.
NPD (2) - A person who suffers from Narcissistic personality disorder or appears to exhibit some of its symptoms. Click Here for More Info on NPD
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Obedience - The Stanley Milgram Experiment -
In 1961 and 1962, Yale University psychologist Stanley Milgram performed a famous series of experiments which demonstrated that about 2 out of 3 people will perform a cruel action towards another person if instructed to do so by someone whom they regard as an authority figure. This demonstrated that most people are prone to doing something they do not want to do, even something they would normally regard as "wrong", just because they are told to do it by an assertive or authoritative person. Click Here for More Information About the Stanley Milgram Experiment.
Object Constancy - Object Constancy is a psychological term used to describe the ability to think of other people or objects as "still there", even when they are out of your immediate field of vision. Object constancy is a developmental skill which most children develop at about age 2-3. A lack of object constancy is a symptom of some personality disorders. Click Here for More Information on Object Constancy.
Over-Reactions -Over-Reactions & triggers are inappropriate dramatic or aggressive responses to small, insignificant or minor situations. People who suffer from personality disorders are often prone to over-reacting or being triggered by events because they experience dramatic cycles in mood and often accept these feelings as facts. Click Here for More Info on Triggering & Over-reactions.
Oz -
"The Wizard of Oz" is a 1944 movie starring Judy Garland which is sometimes used as a metaphor to describe the disconnect between the dissociated reality of the personality-disordered individual (Oz) and the real world experienced by the Non-PD (Kansas). The metaphor is based on the iconic phrase: "Toto - I've a feeling we're not in Kansas any more". Click Here for More Info and a clip from "The Wizard of Oz "
Parallel Parenting – Parallel Parenting is a form of parenting in which a divorced couple assume or are assigned specific parental duties while minimizing or eliminating contact with each other, thus minimizing exposure of the children to potential conflict. Click Here for More Info on Parallel Parenting.
Parental Alienation and Parental Alienation Syndrome -
Parental Alienation is a term which is used to describe the process of one divorced parent inappropriately influencing a child into thinking that the other parent is bad, evil or worthless. Click Here for More Info on Parental Alienation & Parental Alienation Syndrome.
Parentification & Parentified Children - Parentification is a form of role reversal, in which a child of a personality-disordered parent is inappropriately given the role of meeting the emotional or physical needs of the parent or of the other children. Click Here for More Info on Parentification.
PAS – Parental Alienation Syndrome – Parental Alienation Syndrome is the resulting condition that a child who has been subjected to Parental Alienation can have, in which, under the influence of an adult whom they trust, inappropriately believe that one of their parents is worthless, bad or evil. Click Here for More Info on Parental Alienation.
Passive-Aggressive Behavior - Passive-Aggressive Behavior is
Passive Aggressive behavior is the expression of negative feelings, resentment, and aggression in an unassertive, passive way (such as through procrastination and stubbornness). Click Here for More Info on Passive Aggressive Behavior.
Pathology – A Pathology is a psychological term for an abnormal or unhealthy mental condition.
Pathological – Pathological is a psychological term meaning "abnormal" or "unhealthy".
Pathological Liar –
Pathological lying is persistent lying in order to serve one's own needs or desires with little or no regard to the needs or concers of others. A pathological liar is a person who habitually lies to serve their own interests. .Click Here for More information about Lies, Liars & Lying.
Pathological Lying -
Pathological lying is persistent lying in order to serve one's own needs or desires with little or no regard to the needs or concers of others. A pathological liar is a person who habitually lies to serve their own interests. Click Here for More Info on Pathological Lying.
PDAN - Personality Disorders Awareness Network - A non-profit organization dedicated to supporting projects that help children, families, and others understand and cope with Borderline Personality Disorder" http://www.pdan.org
PE - Psychological Evaluator/Evaluation - A Psychological Evaluation is a procedure, typically carried out during a criminal or custody case, in which a mental health professional is appointed by the court to determine a diagnosis or label for a person's psychology, behavior or personality and to make recommendations which a judge can take into account when making a ruling. Click Here for More Info on Psychological Evaluations.
Perfectionism - Perfectionism is the practice of holding oneself or others to an unrealistic, unsustainable or unattainable standard of hygene, organization or order in one particular area of living, while sometimes neglecting common standards of hygene, organization or order in another. Click Here to Learn More about Perfectionism.
Personal Safety - Personal Safety is a list of actions that are designed to keep situations from escalating and to make sure that Physical, Emotional and Verbal abuse is avoided or stopped at the first moment it begins to happen. It contains lists of 1. When to stop the conversation, 2. When to leave the room and 3. When to call the police. Click Here for More Info on Personal Safety.
Placebo Effect - The Placebo Effect is when a medical patient is given a "placebo" or fake medicine - one in which there is no ingredient known to have any effect on their stated medical condition, but the patient, believing that the medicine is real, starts to feel better or reports an improvement in their symptoms.Click Here for More Info on The Placebo Effect.
Playing The Victim - Playing the Victim is the practice of exaggerating or distorting a memory or description of events so as to cast oneself as unjustly treated, hurt, abused or neglected. Click Here for More Info on Playing the Victim.
"Post Hoc Ergo Propter Hoc" Fallacy -
"Post hoc ergo propter hoc" is latin for "After this, therefore because of this" or in other words "If B happened after A, then A must have cuased B to happen". The "Post hoc ergo propter hoc"fallacy is a common mistake in the diagnosis and treatment of medical and psychological conditions.Click Here for More Info on The "Post Hoc Ergo Propter Hoc" Fallacy.
PPD (1) - Paranoid personality disorder.
PPD (2) - A person who suffers from PPD (1) or exhibits some of its symptoms.
Projection -
Projection is the act of attributing one's own feelings or traits onto another person and imagining or believing that the other person has those same feelings or traits.Click Here for More Info on Projection.
Provocative Sabotage - Provocative Sabotage is any action designed to hurt or damage the interests of another person or group for the purpose of provoking a reaction from them.Click Here for More Information on Sabotage.
Proxy - a substitute, surrogate or deputy.
Proxy Recruitment - Proxy Recruitment is a way of controlling or abusing another person by manipulating other people into unwittingly backing you up, speaking for you or "doing your dirty work" for you. Click Here for More Info on Proxy Recruitment.
Psychological Evaluation -
A Psychological Evaluation is a procedure, typically carried out during a criminal or custody case, in which a mental health professional is appointed by the court to determine a diagnosis or label for a person's psychology, behavior or personality and to make recommendations which a judge can take into account when making a ruling. Click Here for More Information on Psychological Evaluations.
PTSD (1) - Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (often shortened form of C-PTSD - Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder)
PTSD (2) - A person who suffers from PTSD or exhibits some of its symptoms.
Putting Children First - Putting Children First means making decisions based on "what is in the best interests of the children", regardless of the consequences for the parents and any other parties involved. Click Here for More Info on Putting Children First.
PUVAS - Pay attention, Understand, Validate, Assert, Shift/Share responsibility - The PUVAS Acronym was created by Paul Mason and Randi Kreger in the book: "Stop Walking on Eggshells" as a method of responding to rages or outbursts.
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Queen - One of the four BPD types (Hermit, Waif, Queen Witch) as defined in Christine Ann Lawson's ground breaking book "Understanding the Borderline Mother". The Queen describes the mother who seeks ultimate control over others in the family. Click Here for More Information on "Understanding The Borderline Mother"
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Rachel Getting Married - Rachel Getting Married is a 2008 Sony Pictures Classics Release starring Anne Hathaway which chronicles the events surrounding the appearance of a young woman who suffers from Antisocial Personality Disorder at her sister's wedding. Click Here for More info on Rachel Getting Married.
Raging, Violence & Impulsive Aggression -
Raging, Violence and Impulsive Aggression are unprovoked verbal or emotional attacks or elevations of a dispute, sometimes accompanied by violence or the destruction of property, which threaten the security or safety of another individual - or violates their personal boundaries.
Click Here for More Info on Raging, Violence & Impulsive Aggression.
RCE - Registered Custody Evaluator - a person appointed by the court in a custody case to recommend to the judge which custody arrangement is in the best interests of the children. Click Here for More Info on Custody Evaluators.
Rescuer Syndrome -
Fix-It Syndrome is when a non-personality-disordered individual frequently puts themselves in the position of a caretaker who is responsible for compensating for their personality-disordered loved-one's behaviors, cleaning up any messes created by their actions and fixing any problems arising from their mental health issues.Click Here for More Info on Rescuer Syndrome.
Riding The Emotional Elevator -
The Emotional Elevator is a way of describing how people who suffer from personality disorders and those closest to them sometimes take a fast track down to different levels of emotional maturity. Click Here for More Info on Riding the Emotional Elevator.
RTC - Residential Treatment Center - a live-in therapy/behavior modification facility for adolescents. Some RTC's are lock-down facilities.
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Sabotage -
Sabotage is the impulsive disruption of a calm or harmonious status quo in a relationship or domestic situatuion, occasionally perpetrated by those with Personality Disorders, in order to serve a personal interest, to provoke a conflict or to draw attention to themselves. Click Here for More Info on Sabotage.
SAD - Seasonal Affective Disorder - A condition in which the sufferer becomes depressed during a particular season - usually winter. Common in extreme Northern & Southern Latitudes
SAID - Sexual Allegations In Divorce (SAID) is a common occurrence in disputed child custody cases in which one parent makes (typically false or exaggerated) claims about sexual abuse of a minor child at the hands of the other parent. Click Here for More Information on SAID.
Sandwiching - Sandwiching is surrounding a negative statement or criticism with two positive statements before and after.
Scapegoating -
Scapegoating is the practice of singling out one child, employee or member of a group of peers for unmerited negative treatment or blame. Click Here for More Info on Scapegoating.
SCID-II - Structured Clinical Interview for DSM-IV Axis II Personality Disorders - a standardized instrument for diagnoses of the 10 DSM-IV Axis II personality disorders, plus Depressive Personality Disorder, Passive-aggressive Personality Disorder, and "Personality Disorder-Not Otherwise Specified".
Selective Competence - Selective Competence is demonstrating intelligence, resourcefulness, strength or competence in one setting or environment (for example, at work) and lack of the same qualities in another (such as in the home). Click Here for More Info on Selective Competence.
Self-Aggrandizement -
Self-Aggrandizement is a pattern of pompous behavior, boasting, narcissism or competitiveness designed to create an appearance of superiority. Click Here for More Info on Self-Aggrandizement.
Self-Harm - Self Harm, also known as self-mutilation, self-injury or self-abuse is any form of deliberate, premeditated injury inflicted on oneself, common among adolescents and among people who suffer from Borderline Personality Disorder. Most common forms are cutting and poisoning/overdosing. Click Here for More Info on Self-Harm.
Self-Loathing -
Self Loathing is an extreme self-hatred of one's own self, actions or one's ethnic or demographic background.
Click Here for More Info on Self-Loathing.
Self-Victimization -
Self-Victimization, or "playing the victim" is the act of casting oneself as a victim in order to control others by soliciting a sympathetic response from them or diverting their attention away from abusive behavior. Click Here for More Info on Self-Victimization.
Entitlement - Entitlement or a 'Sense of Entitlement' is an unrealistic, unmerited or inappropriate expectation of favorable living conditions and favorable treatment at the hands of others. Click Here for More Info on Entitlement.
Serotonin - Serotonin acts as a neurotransmitter in the brain. Increased levels of the neurotransmitters - serotonin, norepinephrine, and dopamine - has been found to reduce depression. This is the basis for most modern antidepressant medications.
SET - Support, Empathy, Truth - System for communicating with people who suffer from BPD recommended in the book "I Hate You, Don't Leave Me" by Jerold Kriesman
Shaming -
The difference between blaming and shaming is that in blaming someone tells you that you did something bad, in shaming someone tells you that you are bad. Invalidation is a form of Shaming. Click Here for More Info on Shaming.
Single White Female - Single White Female is a 1992 Columbia Pictures Release starring Bridget Fonda and Jennifer Jason Leigh which portrays the events after a young woman takes in a roommate who exhibits some of the symptoms of Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) and Dependent Personality Disorder (DPD) including mirroring, impulsivity and fear of abandonment. Click Here for more info on SIngle White Female.
Situational Ethics -
Situational Ethics is a philosophy which promotes the idea that, when dealing with a crisis, the end justifies the means and that a rigid interpretation of the rules, laws and moral codes should be temporarily set aside if a greater good or lesser evil is served by doing so. Understanding situational ethics in the presence of dissociative thought sometimes explains the apparently unethical behavior of people who suffer from personality disorders. Click Here for More Info on Situational Ethics.
Smear Campaigns -
False accusations, distortion campaigns & smear campaigns are patterns of unwarranted or exaggerated criticisms which occur when a personality disordered individual tries to feel better about themselves by putting down someone else - usually a family member, spouse, partner, friend or colleague. Click Here for More Info on False Accusations, Distortion & Smear Campaigns.
SNRI -Serotonin-Norepinephrine Reuptake Inhibitor - a type of antidepressant. Commonly prescribed SNRI's include Effexor and Cymbalta. Click Here for more info on SNRI's
Splitting -
Splitting is the behavior of treating or thinking of people & situations as if they were completely "good" or completely "bad" and to occasionally switch between thinking of them as "all good" or "all bad". Click Here for More Info on Splitting.
Splitting (2) - Splitting is the title of a popular book offering legal advice on divorcing or separating a borderline or narcissist by William Eddy.
Split Black - When a person is temporarily regarded as "all bad" they are referred to as "split black".
Split White - When a person is temporarily regarded as "all good" they are referred to as "split white".
SSRI - SSRI's, or Selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitor's, are the most commonly prescribed antidepressants for people who suffer from personality disorders. Popular SSRI's include Celexa, Lexapro, Prozac, Paxil, & Zoloft. Click Here for more info on SSRI's
Stinkin' Thinkin' - The Ten Forms of Twisted Thinking -
Stinkin' Thinkin', also known as Stinking Thinking or Ten Forms of Twisted Thinking - is a famous list of common negative thought patterns from The Feeling Good Handbook by David D. Burns, M.D. Click Here for the Ten Forms of Twisted Thinking.
Stockholm Syndrome - Brainwashing the Victim -
Stockholm Syndrome is when a hostage, kidnap victim or abuse victim develops a sense of loyalty or co-operation towards their captor or abuser, disregarding the abuse or the danger and protecting or sustaining the perpetrator. Click Here for More Info on Stockholm Syndrome.
Sybil - Sybil is a 1976 movie which portrays the life of a woman who suffers from Multiple Personality Disorder (MPD) / Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID). Click Here for More Information About Sybil.
Testing - Testing is a common practice among people who suffer from personality disorders where a person close to them is put in the position of proving their love or commitment to the relationship by enduring a hardship, sacrificing a pleasure or treasured asset or foregoing a personal goal or ethic. Click Here for More Info on Testing.
Thought Policing -
Thought Policing is any process of trying to question, control, or unduly influence another persons thoughts or feelings. Click Here for More Info on Thought Policing.
Threats -
Threats are written or verbal warnings of intentional, inappropriate, destructive actions or consequences. Click Here for More Info on Threats.
Tunnel Vision - Tunnel Vision is the habit or tendency to only see or focus on a single priority while neglecting or ignoring other important priorities. Click Here for More Info on Tunnel Vision.
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U - Undiagnosed
uBP - Undiagnosed person who has Borderline Personality Disorder or who appears to exhibit some of its symptoms
uAPD - Undiagnosed person who has Antisocial Personality Disorder or who appears to exhibit some of its symptoms.
uBPD - Undiagnosed person who suffers from Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) or exhibits some of its symptoms.
uDPD - Undiagnosed person who suffers from Dependent Personality Disorder (DPD) or appears to exhibit some of its symptoms.
uHPD - Undiagnosed person who suffers from Histrionic Personality Disorder (HPD) or exhibits some of its symptoms.
uMPD - Undiagnosed person who suffers from Multiple Personality Disorder (MPD) or appears to exhibit some of its symptoms.
Unchosen – Unchosen's are people who are in a family relationship with a person who suffers from a personality disorder. they are called "unchosen" because they had no choice in entering into that relationship. Unchosen's include children, parents, siblings or relatives of a person who suffers from a personality disorder. Click here to read more about Unchosen Relationships.
Unchosen Relationship – Unchosen's are people who are in a family relationship with a person who suffers from a personality disorder. they are called "unchosen" because they had no choice in entering into that relationship. Unchosen's include children, parents, siblings or relatives of a person who suffers from a personality disorder. Click here to read more about Unchosen Relationships.
uNPD - Undiagnosed person who suffers from Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) or appears to exhibit some of its symptoms.
uPPD - Undiagnosed person who suffers from Paranoid Personality Disorder (PPD) or exhibits some of its symptoms.
UTBM - "Understanding The Borderline Mother" - a popular book by author Christine Lawson. See Unchosen Books
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Validation - Validation is the process of actively listening to a person as they describe their feelings, echoing back their stated emotions and responding that their feelings are their own property, are legitimate and have value.
Waif - One of the four BPD types (Hermit, Waif, Queen Witch) as defined in Christine Ann Lawson's ground breaking book "Understanding the Borderline Mother". The Waif describes the mother who casts herself as a helpless victim. Click Here for More Information on "Understanding The Borderline Mother"
Witch - One of the four BPD types (Hermit, Waif, Queen Witch) as defined in Christine Ann Lawson's ground breaking book "Understanding the Borderline Mother". The Witch describes the mother who takes pleasure in hurting others in the family. Click Here for More Information on "Understanding The Borderline Mother"
Wizard of Oz - "The Wizard of Oz" is a 1944 movie starring Judy Garland which is sometimes used as a metaphor to describe the disconnect between the dissociated reality of the personality-disordered individual (Oz) and the real world experienced by the Non-PD (Kansas). The metaphor is based on the iconic phrase: "Toto - I've a feeling we're not in Kansas any more". Click Here for More Info and a clip from "The Wizard of Oz "
Dec 30 2009 - Those of you who use the "stay logged in" feature of the Out of the FOG support forum will notice that you unexpectedly had to log in again today. Please don't be alarmed. This was caused by some updates to the board behind the scenes. Please excuse the inconvenience.
Nov 1 2009 - Out of the FOG is celebrating 2 years in bringing information and support to family members and loved-ones of people who suffer from personality disorders. In the two years since we launched, our traffic has grown exponentially and we are rapidly becoming one of the internet's premier sources of information on coping with personality disorders. Happy birthday OOTF and thanks to all our members and supporters around the world.
Out of the FOG Support Forum Zetaboards Upgrade
June 15 2009 - Please excuse our appearance while the Out of the FOG Support Forum upgrades to run on the new Zetaboards software platform. The new software contains a number of new features and improvements over our existing system which should become evident after the conversion is completed.
This upgrade will convert all our existing forums, posts, PM's, memberships and profiles. There should be very little interruption in service or loss of data. The only thing you will notice is changes to the appearance of the graphical interface. It will take 1-2 weeks to complete the conversion.
Our main Out of the FOG information site, here at http://www.outofthefogsite.com will be unaffected by the upgrade. Bookmark this site and visit here if you have any trouble logging into the board. Should any unexpected interruption in our service occur, an announcement will be posted in the "Latest News" Box at at http://www.outofthefogsite.com. Additionally, a temporary discussion forum has been established here which you can use should we experience any long-term interruption of service.
Please excuse any inconvenience you may experience as we perform the upgrade.
June 3 2009 - BPD author A.J. Mahari has launched a new version of her website called BPD INFO which has a section which invites members to submit website articles about BPD. Our own gary submitted an article to her site this week.
