Celebrating the power of boundaries... in all of our relationships

[Starboard Song]

A great place to start is always in a toolbox.

The Out of the FOG toolbox has an outstanding page all about Boundaries. If you've never read it, or it's been a while, check it out.

In my own crisis we didn't know what hit us: we were NC before we knew what BPD was. Boundaries never got a fighting chance. We hadn't read about them and so we made our own mistakes that contributed to the inevitable challenges. Since that moment, like many of you, we got a PhD in doing it right, and we've gotten a lot better. Over time, when the crisis was cooler, I got to really understand that boundaries are about me and my own behavior: what I will or will not do, or engage with. It's made me better appreciate the 50% Rule, and to take more ownership in all my relationships.

Boundaries can be -- usually are, really -- positive. My wife and I agreed early on that, on our walks, we must conclude all conversation about the PD ugliness before we crossed the last bridge. That gave us a final ten minutes or so to talk about good things, and helped us enter our home not still shedding frustration and negativity.

I think a better appreciation of boundaries has made me a better husband, colleague, and friend. Son-in-law? No, I still reportedly suck at that.

Please join us this week to talk boundaries. I hope much of it will be success stories and aha moments. Some of it won't be, because this is hard. No doubt, we will be mixing stories that might normally be on different boards. My MIL, your husband, her colleague or neighbor. This week, if the topic is boundaries, we are all one.

Please jump in.


While you are here,
May is a great month to support causes that contribute to mental health issues.
Among those, we hope you'll choose to Support Out of the FOG.

Thank you for contributing to the conversation:
your words and knowledge and peer-to-peer kindnesses are the most important contribution you can make.