Anyone else's ex turn their attorney into a flying monkey?

[Bunnyme1]

I posted that the divorce hearing is done.  Since then, the lies continue.  Moreover, his attorney is now gaslighting my attorney...denying conversations they have had, flat out lying for him.  I get that the attorney's job is to advocate for their client.  Fair enough.  I don't expect his to take my side on things.  But I am extra sensitive to flat out lying 🤥

[notrightinthehead]

That sounds serious. You might have to insist on written communication only.

[Happytobefree]

Whoa.  I am so sorry!

From this point forward, I agree with the above advice to only have conversations/discussions via email.  That way you will have proof.

As hard as it feels, please try not to take anything your STBXs lawyer says personally.  His job is to defend his client, and he can only go with what he's been (lied to) told by your exH.  My exH's lawyer was the same, until my lawyer presented him with written documentation of certain facts that my exH failed to report to his lawyer.  Once exH's lawyer was given documentation, that's when the tide turned and exH's lawyer saw my exH for who he was and didn't trust him anymore to tell the truth.

Keep your eye on the prize.  You have come so far! 

[Gettintired76]

Bunny it seems my ex has successfully turned the entire judicial system and CPS in her county into flying monkeys.

[JustKeepTrying]

Woh that is serious.  I hope you can keep communications to written only.  I understand it's the attorneys job to protect their client but that gaslighting only adds to the icky lawyer vibe.

[hhaw]

BM:

I had to read your post twice.  I was afraid the ex manipulated YOUR attorney into being a flying monkey.

Sometimes court officers lie, cheat and gaslight.  I find it particularly egregious when children and disordered people are involved.

Lower your expectations for opposing counsel and expect more if the same or worse.

Don't let their toxic behavior knock you off center for long. 

There's a chance opposing counsel will look like an ass for trusting the PD' s lies and acting in them.  I find all attorneys hate being made to look like fools.

This might make your attorney angry at the ex and opposing counsel.  Your attorney might go above and beyond helping you, bc of this.

Sometimes the PD's cut their own throats with all the sabotage and lies, ime. I wish I could go back and stop myself from catastrophising after opposing counsel and PD did things I felt threatened by. 

In the end, some of those things proved the PDs are toxic criminals willing to harm my children and my attorney was SO ticked off she was willing to work without payment up front, which was HUGE!


You can't know how this works out till it's over.  Try to get curious, document like crazy and drop judgment around the PD crazy, as you can.

[Audacity]

I am not long on your path and feel the same. Despite everything I am still the trying to rip her off even though I had offered her additional money earlier on and she refused it then. She has waited until I can't now afford it and wants it. And great to hear her lawyer writing to mine to explain that now I am unreasonable and never had any agreements in place. She admitted to me she is lying to her lawyer and shows no emotions about it. I believe the idea of complete reputation destruction is the main game.