Dads disrespectful attitude to my job

[p123]

p123 - Your dad should be proud of both of his sons.  It sounds like you are both hard-working, self-sufficient adults.  As a parent, you know that we sometimes connect better with or understand one kid more than another.  That's human nature.  But, as parents, we should celebrate all our kids and their successes.  The fact that your father doesn't says a lot about him (and it's not good).  I even understand a tiny bit of jealousy towards our children.  My DD had access to opportunities that I didn't have simply because she was born into a world where women could achieve more.  I still remember wearing pants and a sweater to work one day, rather than a suit and hose.  The looks I got!!!  A woman in the workplace in pants?  The horror.  Times have changed, and I am happy that my daughter is the beneficiary of those changes.  And I am a teeny bit envious as well.  But I would never begrudge her the opportunities she's had.  And I am proud of her, just as I am proud of my DS who is still trying to find his way, and working darn hard at it.  I'm really sorry that your dad doesn't appreciate you - it's not right.

Well...........................

My brother and I no longer speak. His life is different to mine. I mentioned in another post his tax issues, he's been in lots of financial trouble too.
Hes got 3 kids from 3 different previous relationships. Doesn't bother to see any of the kids (hes married again). (You may have seen a post I did once about him abandoning his daughter into care once when the mother of his daughter had "issues" and couldnt look after her).

Hey each to his own. If he wants to live his life like that then go ahead...

Me on the other hand. Married 26 years, 2 lovely kids, my own business. Yet I always get the impression that Dad seems to relate more to brother.

[p123]

Notice a few posts about being female. With Dad it'd be worse if I was gay....

He often says how disgusting it is. I used to argue but don't now because hes just so thick and it gets me so annoyed.
Especially when he says "its in the bible".

Wonder if he'll believe me if I tell him I'm gay (Im not) - he might never speak to me again with any luck!

[Danden]

"Wonder if he'll believe me if I tell him I'm gay (Im not) - he might never speak to me again with any luck!"


lololol  That's a good one!  Very clever.  Do it!  Turn their own ignorance against them.  I love it!!

[p123]

"Wonder if he'll believe me if I tell him I'm gay (Im not) - he might never speak to me again with any luck!"


lololol  That's a good one!  Very clever.  Do it!  Turn their own ignorance against them.  I love it!!

Would love to... Imagine his face

[JustKathy]

I've just been without a contract for a few months (it happens!). He kept on and on that I should get "any job" like a job in a supermarket just to get "any job".

Yes! My Nmother did this too. At one point I was working at the executive level and my husband's job was relocated out of state to a much smaller city. I was worried that I wouldn't be able to find comparable work there. Nmother said something like, "Well they have a Target there. You could work as a salesgirl. Or you could bag groceries."

[p123]

I've just been without a contract for a few months (it happens!). He kept on and on that I should get "any job" like a job in a supermarket just to get "any job".

Yes! My Nmother did this too. At one point I was working at the executive level and my husband's job was relocated out of state to a much smaller city. I was worried that I wouldn't be able to find comparable work there. Nmother said something like, "Well they have a Target there. You could work as a salesgirl. Or you could bag groceries."

Yep thats my Dad too. "A jobs a job" is his favourite saying....

[Empie2204]

Jeez!

They are all the same: attitude towards women - but they gladly use the money if she is working.

My H´s favorite saying is a paraphrase of what  p123 wrote:
It´s not a proper job unless you're "using a shovel". You know: everybody has to start from the bottom and make their hands dirty.

When kids enter the working world and find jobs by themselves, they criticize their choice even if they find a nice job, with good working conditions and a nice salary.

They compensate in a heavyweight manner.

[Liketheducks]

Notice a few posts about being female. With Dad it'd be worse if I was gay....

He often says how disgusting it is. I used to argue but don't now because hes just so thick and it gets me so annoyed.
Especially when he says "its in the bible".

Wonder if he'll believe me if I tell him I'm gay (Im not) - he might never speak to me again with any luck!

There is an evil troll that lives in my brain and LIVES for messing with them like this.   There are so few positives having family members with this particular brand of dysfunction.   Gotta get your laughs in where you can.

[JustKathy]

Yep thats my Dad too. "A jobs a job" is his favourite saying....

I think they do like suggesting we accept low-level employment because, in their mind, that's all we're worthy of. And of course, it's a huge put-down to someone who is educated and employed at a level they never achieved.

When my mother would make those comments it always reminded me of that scene in Caddyshack where Carl Spackler asks Chevy Chase's wealthy character if he can use his pool. "We have a pond in the back. We have a pool ... and a pond. The pond would be good for you." 

[p123]

Yep thats my Dad too. "A jobs a job" is his favourite saying....

I think they do like suggesting we accept low-level employment because, in their mind, that's all we're worthy of. And of course, it's a huge put-down to someone who is educated and employed at a level they never achieved.

When my mother would make those comments it always reminded me of that scene in Caddyshack where Carl Spackler asks Chevy Chase's wealthy character if he can use his pool. "We have a pond in the back. We have a pool ... and a pond. The pond would be good for you." 

A lot with Dad is he would never take a risk - he'd take the first ever job that came along. Which is why he worked in a factory in a job he hated for 40 years because it was "safe".

Small-minded is not the word.....