Discovery - blocking a phone number

[Call Me Cordelia]

You know, Mo, I've thought about doing exactly that. I really have. My uPD father used to quip that, "He'd pay for my therapy," when I was upset by his abuse, thinking it was so clever. Just like he left the manual at the hospital, hardeeharhar.

But I knew I would just get back a "credit" against all he spent on my room and board, education, blah blah blah and then a much larger bill in return. Never get into a land war in Asia, or a pissing contest with a narcissist. You will not get the satisfaction you seek.

I'm so glad you have started EMDR. That homework sounds like an interesting exercise!

[moglow]

It was exhausting, to be honest. Draining. Doing just the worst list would have melted me down, by doing both I had distraction and genuine feel goods to counter the bad stuff. Comparisons were interesting. Even with my memory gaps, I didn't have "best" that involved mommie dearest other than on the periphery here and there.

[Andeza]

Thank you for sharing that homework, Moglow. I've decided I'm going to sit down and do it to as time allows. Should be interesting, although I expect I'll find something similar.

So proud of you, by the way. Working on yourself is such a wonderful thing!

[moglow]

Andeza, it was harder than I expected. You have to dig down and basically relive in order to write it out. It's cathartic bringing it to the light of day and at the same time you're taken back to some very dark times. After a few rounds with the worst list I flipped over to work on the best, had to find some balance.

There's an easing inside for me already, not having her interference or the angst of her possibly calling. I'm not doubting my decision to block her, not trying to figure out how to explain it. I told her way back that I had to do what I feel is best for me. I'm finally neither apologizing nor feeling I owe her an explanation of any kind.