"An Abbreviated Life" by Ariel Leve

[Coyote23]

Absolutely incredible memoir with uncanny descriptions of what it feels like to have a PD parent. Ariel is an acclaimed journalist and her mother was a famous poet in New York City who threw lavish parties with famous guests like Andy Warhol.

Ariel's mother appears to have a toxic mix of Narcissistic and Borderline traits and makes her daughter miserable until she goes no contact at 46. I resonated with this book a lot, especially as I'm not much younger than she is, grew up in the same era and went NC with my father at 42. .

This quote about going no contact is just staying with me: (The text at the end is auto generated when I share something from an electronic book on iBooks)

"I IMAGINE THAT if someone were to see this, they would think what a horrible daughter I must be. Heartless, as my mother says. Indecent. But disconnecting is something that is necessary or I will be devoured. It is her or me—and I choose me. There is no middle ground. And slowly I discover that I am able to ignore these emails without fear of retribution. I shrug off the frantic nature, the cries for help, the pleas to stay close. There will be people who see this as insensitive or even unkind. I can accept that. There is nothing I miss."

Excerpt From: Leve, Ariel. "An Abbreviated Life." HarperCollinsPublishers, 2016-04-19. iBooks.
This material may be protected by copyright.

Check out this book on the iBooks Store: https://itun.es/us/Kyw75.l

[SaltwareS]

I heard her interviewed on the WTF podcast and was intrigued. Requested this one from the local library.

[Jade63]

Yes, good read for folks like us.
Although I did not grow up with the same materially privileged life as the author, I was validated just the same.

I am just starting on The Glass Castle, which seems to be the other side of the coin in regards to an underprivileged upbringing but with the same dysfunction.

~J

[FreyaRussell]

There's a big difference between hurting someone and harming someone. Hurt can sometimes cause growth for both parties but harm most definitely injures. What feels good can harm (sugar rots teeth) and what hurts can heal (dentist fills cavity) and keeping this in mind is helping me reconcile things in my mind.

[BrettLog]

Fantastic book. I've read it a few months ago. Ariel Leve just nailed it with this book.