New digs - freedom!!

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ShyTurtle

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New digs - freedom!!
« on: February 02, 2021, 06:04:06 AM »
I finally got out of the bpd housemate situation yesterday when I moved into my new apartment with my boyfriend yesterday!

She kicked my son and I out a month ago, in the middle of the covid lockdown, and we haven't spoken to each other directly since then. I believe she did the mental splitting thing around and she viewed me as the spawn of satan. It was around that time that the nitpicking texts started. Everything I did seemed to piss her off and every interaction was toxic.  When I first moved into her place, she treated me like her new found bff, and at the time I remember thinking that was a bit off and creepy.

So yesterday after I left, she texted me to say "is that it?" And "you didn't leave the keys" so I just texted back the location where I left them and said thanks to her for taking me and my son in. After that she thanked me and wished me well. It could have gone much worse and I'm so glad it didn't.

Oddly, her mother texted me later that evening to tell me that she had askedher daughter to disclose her mental health status BEFORE I moved in. She did so AS I was moving in directly from the womens shelter - who at the time were giving me breathing problems from their excessive use of cleaning chemicals during covid.  I was in the women's shelter from escaping a pd ex for the 2nd time, and doing therapy for it. I was really between a rock and a hard place and moving in with her seemed like my best option at a time when I was still being stalked. She lives in a remote location. And then I didn't count on my son's dad abusing him to the point where he experienced a mental health crisis which landed him in the hospital, and he would decide to come live with me again. I'm grateful that she took him in too, but not grateful for him also experiencing the feces in the bathtub, the grime, her anxious dog, or her toxic nitpicking.

So when her mom texted me, a part of me wanted to tell her about her daughter's inappropriate fecal/plumbing issues, her maladaptive binge eating, her sex-capades into polyamoury during covid lockdown - where she was undoubtedly being sexually used. Its all very sad really. Instead, I only echoed her sentiment that living with a pd person is really hard.

And then my son informed me.that he left his favourite hand painted mug behind. I guess we're not done yet afterall!

I had never anticipated cohabitation with my boyfriend after only 3 months together, but here I am. I love him so much and my therapist confirms tht all clues point to him being a healthy, non-pd individual. So there's that. I wouldnt have been.able to afford an apartment on my own, and the geared to income appartments are very backlogged. I am so hopeful that this time it works out!
« Last Edit: February 02, 2021, 06:11:30 AM by ShyTurtle »
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JollyJazz

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Re: New digs - freedom!!
« Reply #1 on: February 02, 2021, 07:07:00 AM »
Woooot!!!  :fireworks: :woohoo: what wonderful news!!!

And crikey, it sounds like you've been through the wringer... I think you did so well turning a very stressful time of being stalked and at a shelter into a time of growth by going through therapy. That's awesome 😎

How great that you've found a nice, non PD person and are together!!! 😀

I'm just so so thrilled for you! I hope you have a lovely time of rest and peace and enjoying a clean bathtub! 😊

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ShyTurtle

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Re: New digs - freedom!!
« Reply #2 on: February 02, 2021, 10:19:19 PM »
Woooot!!!  :fireworks: :woohoo: what wonderful news!!!
Thank so much!!! It's all so great so far and my new bathtub is glorious!!
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Amadahy

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Re: New digs - freedom!!
« Reply #3 on: February 03, 2021, 04:55:39 PM »
Congrats, ShyTurtle!   :bouncing:
Ring the bells that still can ring;
Forget your perfect offering.
There's a crack in everything ~~
That's how the Light gets in!

~~ Leonard Cohen

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Thru the Rain

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Re: New digs - freedom!!
« Reply #4 on: February 03, 2021, 05:24:25 PM »
So happy for you and your son!

And wishing some healing and peace for your former room-mate - but far, far away from you!

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I.Matter

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Re: New digs - freedom!!
« Reply #5 on: February 04, 2021, 01:18:34 PM »
Many blessings to you Shy Turtle!   Happy that you're done with that last situation.

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ShyTurtle

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Re: New digs - freedom!!
« Reply #6 on: February 05, 2021, 06:36:39 AM »
Thanks everyone! Each day that goes by, I feel so much lighter! I've truly left that situation behind and started the next chapter in my life!
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Andeza

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Re: New digs - freedom!!
« Reply #7 on: February 05, 2021, 01:25:01 PM »
Congratulations! So happy you left pdland behind!
Remember, that there are no real deadlines for life, just society's pressures.      - Anonymous
Lasting happiness is not something we find, but rather something we make for ourselves.