Anyone Know about this one?

[tommom]

My uPDh is lying in bed, not going to work, because he is...constipated. Yep. Called in to his boss who he said, with hurt in his voice - "chuckled about it."  Unhuh.

He has been horrific all day, more explosive and verbally abusive than "normal". I have spent most of the day in verbal defense, drawing boundary after boundary with him. Or avoiding him. Pretty serious.

He is extremely narcissistic. He will do anything for attention/supply. Today has been spent going into the bathroom and loudly (and I mean loudly) moaning and groaning. At a really ridiculous level. When asked what if I might do this or that to help, he says, "no, no, NO!" Nothing will work or help or anything else according to him. (It is from iron supplements. I found this out myself at my doctor's. Why didn't he ask someone?) 

Has anyone else every heard this one? Do you think he is just being his two-year-old self in a new way, demanding my attention (that is NOT something I will attend to, thanks!) or is this like a symptom of....anything? (He is 70 plus, but no history of dementia, etc, Yep, already thought of that one.) I really don't understand it. He is in bed, sleeping now, waking occasionally that say that he is going to go into work. (And we  do really need the money!) I have, even at my hoary age and after 47 years with him, nearly reached the end of my rope.

I really, really am lost here.

[Seven]

Give him a bottle of magnesium citrate and about 6 hours and he should be right as rain.

[livinginmyhead]

Weird.  I know 2 suspected N's.  Their lives(and as a result everyone around them) revolve around their bowels.  One of the believes you MUST defecate at least four times a day.  The other does it with the bathroom door open and central hvac full bore to spread the foul aroma as far and wide as possible.  If they mess up the seat they don't even bother to clean it up.

Its got to be some kind of anal fixation or marking of territory.  They are in the bathroom for literally hours.

I set up a little toilet in the garage for emergencies for when they have both bathrooms tied up.

Their shits are the most epic, monumental,odorific,noisome tribute to their behaviour as a whole and they are a force to be reckoned with.

[blunk]

I was always sort of disturbed by how much my bpdxh shared about his bathroom habits. Beyond that, he would tell me how abnormal I was because I did not go as frequently as he did. And because I did not sit in there for 30-45 minutes the way he did. I would do my best not to discuss it, saying things like, you have your normal and I have mine.

At one point he did develop severe constipation, and on one particular night it kept him in the bathroom for hours, starting around the time I went to bed. I was woken by him yelling to me at around 330 in the morning (I got up for work at 530) that I needed to get get him something from the store to relieve it. I wanted to ask why he didn't just go for himself (not like it was diarrhea), but I knew it wasn't worth the rage and accusations that would ensue. I came to find out a few days later that it was caused by his abuse of opioids. And I later came to find out that was not the only substance he was abusing.

And, no, it didn't interfere with him going to work...since he was more than 2 years without a job at that point. It did, however, interfere with me going to work as it was just one more instance of being woken in the middle of the night, and a pattern of chronic sleep deprivation.

[tommom]

Thanks, guys. It is good to know I'm not the only one experiencing this.  livinginmyhead, he has his own bathroom (I required it when we bought this house) and I have one thing I am glad for with the quarantine...no one comes by. It is worse than any public restroom in ANY gas station. Disgusting. And I am not at all prissy.

Guess all of the drama and craziness was just an ante up. He is focused on his bathroom habits to the point I have, many times, told him it is waaaay more information than I would like. Doesn't help.

He's better today. Thanks to everyone for your input.

[1footouttadefog]

There can be age related aspects to to constipation.  Also not chewing food well and poor diet can contribute.  Gas or fecal matter can build up against the valve between sections of intestine causong it to stop working.  Messaging soft sides above pelvic bone and warm/hot baths can help.

Iron is a sure way.  There is iron thst is coated so its absorbed in a dofferent oart of intestine to help prevent this.  I learned the very hard way when pregnant, LOL.  I have had a healty respect for impaction ever since. 

My PD got impacted last year and had accute urinary retention due to taking way to many benadryls as a sleep aid against his Dr.s advise to discontinue them altogether.  Then he had to wear shorts while the catheter and catch bag was in place despite it being winter time.

The focus on all things scatological is common with pd and mentally ill people.