Useful Acronyms

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Oscen

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Useful Acronyms
« on: July 08, 2021, 11:14:21 AM »
This website has introduced me to immensely useful acronyms:
FOG - fear, obligation, guilt
JADE - justify, attack, defend, explain
DARVO - deny, attack, reverse victim/offender

I'd like to add one more - all I have in this world, for myself or to offer others, is "TEA" - time, attention, energy.
No-one is entitled to these things of mine. They're for me, and mine to choose to give, if I want.

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Cat of the Canals

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Re: Useful Acronyms
« Reply #1 on: July 10, 2021, 12:48:26 PM »
Well I have a bit of an obsession with tea, so I really like that one and won't forget it! My TEA is important, damn it!

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Jolie40

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Re: Useful Acronyms
« Reply #2 on: July 10, 2021, 02:59:34 PM »
have looked up acronyms as needed from people using them

however, had no idea FOG was one :stars:

thought it meant actual fog & we're in this cloudy fog, unable to see!
fear, obligation, guilt- of course, makes perfect sense
« Last Edit: July 10, 2021, 03:03:46 PM by Jolie40 »
be good to yourself

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xredshoesx

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Re: Useful Acronyms
« Reply #3 on: July 11, 2021, 12:02:13 PM »
i love the TEA acronym!!!

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Andeza

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Re: Useful Acronyms
« Reply #4 on: July 11, 2021, 12:07:08 PM »
I like that! I think "you can't have my tea" is a great resolution to make when dealing with any form of toxicity from others.
Remember, that there are no real deadlines for life, just society's pressures.      - Anonymous
Lasting happiness is not something we find, but rather something we make for ourselves.

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Oscen

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Re: Useful Acronyms
« Reply #5 on: July 12, 2021, 08:57:02 AM »
"you can't have my tea"

Yes, I like that!

And sharing tea is such a gesture of communion. I happily share tea with those I love. People who just take tea can stay the hell away from my teapot!  ;)

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Boat Babe

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Re: Useful Acronyms
« Reply #6 on: July 12, 2021, 08:58:30 AM »
Right now, I'm gonna have a nice cup of tea, just for me.
It gets better. It has to.

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Oscen

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Re: Useful Acronyms
« Reply #7 on: July 12, 2021, 11:17:23 AM »
however, had no idea FOG was one :stars:

Jolie 40, It's good, right? Of course, the fogginess is part of the meaning too. I don't know if it was made up as a backronym but it's pretty handy.
I can't remember when I learned what it stood for but I keep having periodic amnesia about it!
I've learned so much from reading & youtube and then the trauma/splitting makes me forget loads of details.
Or, I just recognise things like this as an abstract concept and don't realise that it's happening very concretely in my life!

I realised recently that I was still completely fogged by my family; every thought about them was full of fear, obligation and guilt. Every thought!
Which was triggering me into JADEing obsessively to myself - ruminating, if you will.
It's so handy to have the mnemonic to go - Oh, I'm (making myself) feeling FOG and I'm JADEing - again! And I don't need to feel or do any of this. Phew!

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Oscen

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Re: Useful Acronyms
« Reply #8 on: July 12, 2021, 11:20:29 AM »
 :cheer: :cheer: :cheer:
Right now, I'm gonna have a nice cup of tea, just for me.

:like: