Progress: from living for THEM to living for MYSELF

[MarlenaEve]

Hi and sorry for posting so much here these days.

But I just realized the huge progress I've made from 2018 to today.

In 2018, I still lived for the approval of my parents. I was living abroad and was very desperate to get this crush to notice me so that we can get together and show him to my family. The idea was that, if they saw him, they'd change their minds about me. They'd finally realize I am lovable and special and they were darn wrong about me.

Today, my goals have nothing to do with relationships or parents. They're about pleasing myself. For example, a goal I have is to save money to move abroad again and invest in my creative career. International living is one of my passions and it also gives me the chance to put a huge distance between me and them.

My goals are also about fulfilling old dreams that couldn't have been fulfilled due to NM's influence like publishing a novel or becoming financially healthy. None of these goals have something to do with pleasing someone or getting validation from them.

I think reading about NPD behavior, watching endless youtube videos on it and just keeping an objective view on how serious the abuse was in my life really helped get Out of the FOG.

Have you experienced something like this? Like you've finally reached a level where you only want to accomplish goals to please yourself or your inner child and not your FOO?

[JustKeepTrying]

YES!!!  I am so happy for you and what a beautiful post that encourages me to do the same!