Collect resources and make plans ahead of time

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1footouttadefog

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Collect resources and make plans ahead of time
« on: September 27, 2021, 02:37:59 PM »
Some have likely read my recent threads about having to hospitalized my pdh.

I won't repeat all that here, but in brief, he had a prolonged bout of sinus trouble wherein he abused 12hour nasal spray.  He eventually had a sinus surgery and the surgeons use of the same chemical as part of a numbing solution would erase progress in his quitting it each time for followup procedures to clean debris from sinuses.   Somehow this medication Was working systemically and making his psychiatric issues way more pronounced.    Eventually he was actually psychotic and needed hospitalized.

All the docs were saying that only a rebound effect of vessels swelling was an issue from the Afrin spray.  My research after the fact shows otherwise, so I am a little optimistic that future episodes are not going to be common and am relieved that pdh did not go where he was permanently.  It was seeming very permenant at the point I was refusing to bring him home.

It was without a doubt the right thing to do in having him hospitalized.  He had reached a place mentally where it was way out if the scope of what we could deal with. The first half of his 12 days in hospital he was pretty much out of sorts still.  He finally sounded normal.  I think he learned that words and actions have consequences and that police will be called anytime he threatens himself or us, as we are not trained to sort this out, the real from the bullying threats etc.

Covid has put pressure on all medical and Insituational living facilities in my area.  I had to make changes to bring him home.  We created a separate apartment from part of the house.

I am also making plans for upcoming episodes as it appears this may just be something that is going to happen every couple or few years.  In the meantime the dementia like symptoms require future planning and collecting resources of another nature.  Plans for any future episodes like we just had are being made.  I am trying to find out how to get more dynamic care when things first seem to be off.  I may get a parallel Dr. Team outside the VA as they are not so easy to move quickly with if things get off the rails.

It's hard to know the time lines but it's obvious changes will take place, and being dynamic in responding is required to avoid worst outcomes. Medicine changes made early could potentially  minimize impacts.

I encourage anyone else dealing with a multiple diagnosed pd partner to start sooner not later collecting the information you need and finding out what is available to you. Start saving and putting in place what is needed to remain safe if mental health of your partner or yourself becomes effected.

A few days of hotel money and a packed bag might bring some stress relief.  Being able to go or place the pd away so you cam simply get sleep and take a long bath might be enough to keep your from breaking.  Having a day away from the pd to get caught up with phone calls and paperwork might take the edge off overwhelming demands on you.

Knowing how to get a person placed in a psych ward, or picked up by the police or sherriff when they threaten themselves and others is a must.  A DV hotline or shelter social worker may be able to help you gather such info ahead of time. 

Even if your pd partner is not dual diagnosed such contengency planning is recommended in my opinion.  After a decade of reading here, it's simply common for these folks to loose it at some point and place those around them in violent scenarios, or to escalate various forms of abuse.







« Last Edit: September 27, 2021, 02:50:08 PM by 1footouttadefog »

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square

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Re: Collect resources and make plans ahead of time
« Reply #1 on: September 27, 2021, 02:56:45 PM »
Thanks, Iíll keep this in mind.

Itís true that institutions and social services are strained or broken. A bed in a hospital is no longer a given, nor rehab, assisted living, or nursing home care.

For Americans:

For veterans, please do look into VA options including a pension that can help with care costs.

Some situations may benefit from a Power of Attorney. If the ill person trusts you, this would need to be sorted before they become incapacitated, because otherwise the process is much harder. POA allows you to act in the personís stead legally, signing documents, accessing funds, etc.

You can call 911 for a mental health episode. If you or the ill person fears police involvement you can call your local ambulance company direct instead of 911 (have this number handy) and you can ASK if they might pick up without police or with police hanging back. Not sure if some states have laws around this but in my area ambulance can decide if they feel safe coming into a situation alone.

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1footouttadefog

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Re: Collect resources and make plans ahead of time
« Reply #2 on: September 27, 2021, 06:59:18 PM »
Fortunately or unfortunately depending on how you look at it and where in the time line, I had already taken gaudianship over my spouse and have medical POA.

We did pretty good estate planning many years ago to benifit our children as we, especially pdh are later in life parents.

This does make things easier in that he does not have to entirely agree.  I do my uttermost to let him be as independent and let him be who he is as much as possible.  I play more than fair.  Yet, it's a relief to not havw to worry daily who he will bump I to and decide to try to win or buy narc supply from putting us all at risk in the mean time.