stop the world i want to get off.

[BrightMoon]

I just cant take it today. The more I learn about the world the more shocked I am. I used to be an idealist until I realised how the world is run. Im not religious but yesterday I read about one and was shocked at some of the things they say. Im centre ground politically, but it shocks me how it seems everyone just seems to want to tread all over each other, everyone wants to kill each other.

Everyone is so selfish and unthinking, ignoring that for a society to work it has to be tolerant but not extreme. Has to be flexible but still have rules. it seems people are either selfish and extreme on the end of the spectrum or the same on the other. what happened to balance? what happened to moderation? and so many people just bury their heads in the ground and ignore the awful things powerful people are doing to the poor. we have technology that can do almost anything yet its used for the most awful, awful things. So much money but in the hands of so few people. So few rights - and so often for the wrong things.

Even knowing there's others out there who get any of what Im saying would be something.

[Amadahy]

Oof.  I hear you. 

What gets me through is focusing on the good that doesn't always shout from the rooftops or gain tv airtime.  The people who rescue feral animals.  The people who try to ease the pain of homelessness for our neighbors.  The people who offer a kind word.  The people who do not forget to visit the sick, jailed or hurting.  I know it is the "biggies" that get the attention:  the greedy darker side of humanity folks, but really, the world has more good than not, or it would have given up the ghost by now.  Still, the burden of realization is great to bear, so please do try to take care of you.

If you are in a good place, you can be the change we wish to see (Gandhi).  It doesn't have to be grandiose, but it will help give you peace.  Mother Theresa said to do little things with great love.  I think that's a do-able place to start, if you're so inclined.  But, first, take care of you.  There's another thread around here -- "What gives you joy?"  I've not posted there, but it's been a great point for me to ponder every day, a great place to start my day, to remind myself that there is still joy.  Maybe it will help you, too.

Here's hoping for your peace and little (or big!) instances of goodness to color your days.  Some days it is really, really hard and I've been utterly despondent, too, but it is not of benefit to me or to those who love me to stay there.  I don't say any of this lightly or in a pollyanna way to discount your pain.  I just know that you have the ability to transform the pain, when you remind yourself that you are light, strength, peace and goodness and that you make a difference.  I hope I've not written out of turn.  Please take care. 

PS. My own post of 1/30/22 shows some of my angst.  You are not alone.  Things can get better, more bearable, even beautiful.  We are magic and we must remember this when the world wants us to forget. 

[square]

Heya,

The world has gotten more polarized, but moderates are still going strong! It's just easier to hear the loudest, most extreme voices.

It's a very difficult time for sure. I like to remember that these things are not linear but cyclical. Periods like this occur throughout history. Sometimes it gets really bad. But then it quiets down again. The price is often extremely high but sometimes what comes out of it is quite valuable. Eventually.

In the meantime, we can all do our part to be the balance.

[Starboard Song]

I totally get what you are saying.

I will often speak my mind on public policy matters I find critical. My goal is never to end the discussion with the other side persuaded. It is to end the discussion with the other side having read my words and not felt attacked, insulted, or belittled. I want folks to actually be shocked that at the end of the day they felt a little brighter because of our interaction.

And these days, you are right, that seems so hard. It isn't one "side" doing it, either. I feel like once level-headed people seem less so today.

Don't fear, or give in. We -- each of us -- can do better.

Here was a big factor in improving my mental health on this issue. I stopped caring about total strangers online or in the news, and began focusing on the real human beings I knew, met, and interacted with. Some are online, to be sure. This forum, for instance, is a valued resource for a very special topic, and it is heavily moderated for tone, respect, and culture. I can trust people here.

But I wanted most of my interactions to be more "real." I have consistently been avoiding discussion threads with strangers, avoiding the habit of thinking anything I see on the news is common and accepted, and never going to war in my head with any folks I don't know personally made a huge improvement.

I now find that I can discuss even hot-button issues with almost anyone. They may get a little hot at me, but I never fire back. I thank them politely for engaging, make it clear that I understand there are multiple view points, and agree that the issue is important. Sometimes it is too late, but almost everyone accepts my good faith, and comes away a little less likely to engage in road rage.

You can be one of the Good Guys in the world, helping everyone be more respectful to each other. It is just very very hard at this particular point in this particular cycle.

Don't lose hope. Most humans are just as kind and decent and smart (and just as mean and vulgar and ignorant) as ever. It is our job, every day, to feed the good wolf.

[BrightMoon]

Im reading all these wonderful replies just now at the end of my day. thank you, thank you, THANK YOU!! It feels so good to know there are people out there who took the time to read my splurge of pain. I had a tough one today, but I decided not to focus on the big things that went wrong, but on the small things that went right. And, as one of you mentioned-that these global events are cyclical, and one day will turn once more. I guess I need to stop judging myself on 'days' too (did i eat my 5 a day veg  & fruit today? did i drink enough water for today? did i exercise enough today? etc etc), and trust more that, over a NUMBER of days, things will even out. And that's what has happened. the day after beating myself up for only having 2 lots of veg, I happened to crave it and had 7 lots! So it worked out. I set so many goals for myself daily and struggle when i dont meet them or things shift (as they did today).

Anyway-it helps to know I can share how i am doing with others, and i genuinely got a lot from reading all your replies-there's some good food for thought there.

All the best to you and yours, and to everyone here. I'm glad I posted.       

[LemonLime]

Hi BrightMoon,
I just want you to know you're not alone.  As you can see by the replies!       I often have the same thoughts you express, and now I try to hide them so as not to be too much of a Debbie Downer.  But I am wired to be a risk-averse and cautious person, and I'm always looking out for the worst-case scenario, as I was trained to do as a physician.  I am trying to see that as a gift and not a liability, but I certainly have gotten lots of feedback since I was a child that I am "too intense".  And I do read the news and now so often see the rot in major corporations and organizations.  It can be depressing and worst of all it can make me feel hopeless.

I live in a country where recently we have been gaslighted by a malignant narcissist.  It was quite traumatizing for me to see the same techniques used by this narcissist as have been used against me by PD's in my life.  Just on a grander scale.  And a far more dangerous path.  And this PD was not short on enablers too.

One thing I do know for sure:  Most people are very very good, and just want to raise their families in peace.  Many people are very very selfless.  They just don't get much press.  One thing I've tried to do is look for a "good news" story for every more depressing one I read.
It's a hard time to be a human.  Harder in some ways than when we had to hunt and gather our own food and fight off predators.  It's just a different kind of hard.
This forum in itself is proof that good still prevails.
Hugs

[1footouttadefog]

I have at times been especially sensitive to what is wrong in the world.  It can be discouraging if not depressing to see the extremism and lack of tolerance and rejection of constructive discourse when people choose to just name call instead. 

It can seem like every institution and organization is fraudulent, and unethical.  At times the truth can even seem hard to find.

I get there and it does not feel good to be sure and it's a funk that can lead one down rabbit holes or into negativity.

I try to step back from it all and to not take in outside information and reground myself in what is good and true.  My dog is good and so is my cat's. I have great kids.  I like my house even if it's not as tidy as I want at all times. 

Hagen Das ice cream still works for me.  Flowers are still pretty.  I can go out into my community and see wonderful things taking place.  I can here people chatting happily stores, and see people of diverse ethnicities getting along.  I can call old friends and find they have not changed into evil trolls or become corrupt politicians or worse. 

I think we can all use a change of perspective once in a while to see that even though some things are not good it's possible to make a live that includes mostly good folks and have decent even if imperfect days.