Fear

[Lauren17]

I no longer fear uNPDxh. I used to tense up whenever he came in the room. I flinched when he showed the slightest sign of anger.
I've been walking on eggshells for decades.

I'm not sure when this happened. Or what triggered the change. But, the last couple of times I've interacted with him at co-parenting events, he's clearly furious with me. And it doesn't bother me at all!  No flinching. No fawning. No fear in the pit of my stomach.  Nothing!

This is such an empowering, liberating discovery.

[Lookin 2 B Free]

WOW!   What a huge victory!!!   

[Srcyu]

Great news!
He's 'clearly' furious' because he has seen the change in you. It's a huge, massive step forward.

[escapingman]

That's fantastic! I am not there yet with STBX but I am getting less tense when I see her.

[NarcKiddo]

Wonderful news!

[square]

What an accomplishment!

Maybe you just can't take him seriously anymore?

[hhaw]

My T would say you've managed, somehow, to feel safe enough for your brain to process your traumas.

She'd say fight or flight/survival/reptilian brain was turned off, bc you found a way OR your body and Nervous System found a way to engage your Parasympathetic Nervous System, restoring reason, logic and creative problem solving in your life, which gave you more choice and the ability to respond/be responsive rather than reactive only.

And her eyes would sparkle and she'd be so very proud and happy for you.... then she'd want to know how you did it.