little over a mos since death

[Jolie40]

and my one sibling is posting ALL over the internet that she can't get over PD parent's death
every single posting about losing a mom, she makes comments!

-she said that mom was her best friend!
-she posted "she's falling in love but doesn't have mom to share the news"
(she didn't tell me even tho I've FT with her almost weekly for a whole year! felt sorry for her living in another state by herself & she kept saying on FB "I'm all alone" I ask her every week "what's new" & she replies "nothing"
-she told me she's depressed & can't sleep since mom died

this is a sibling who complained constantly to me (before the death) that she got too many calls from mom daily & calls were interrupting her work day......literally complained ALL the time
NOW she says she misses the calls!

what gives?

[Jolie40]

I do know grieving can take a long time
as I grieved our one dog for a whole year

however, I'm So surprised to see sibling post that mom was her best friend!
very surprising since she complained So much about mom's endless calls to her

maybe sibling became dependent on those calls?

[moglow]

Jolie they may have been very enmeshed, where your sib is really having trouble facing life without her. Her whole self may have been wound up in mom, possibly now realizing how much room that took up. Even if it wasn't great with mom, sib may be lost.

[Jolie40]

Jolie they may have been very enmeshed, where your sib is really having trouble facing life without her.

that must be it!
they did talk on the phone every day & several times/day
so now there is silence

since sibling is all alone in another state, I can see now that she feels more alone
I was just surprised that she said "mom was best friend"

hard for me to understand when mom only called me once/year......she expected me to do the calling
yet she called all my other siblings daily

[SunnyMeadow]

I think people have a tendency to turn the deceased into saints. Somehow the loss washes away all the annoying and awful things done by the person who died. Death white-washes the memories in a way. So maybe that's why your sister has turned your mother into her "best friend".

I've noticed this with me for example. My uNPDmother died last April and I've found myself forgetting about and diluting her actions. I've been going back and reading a bunch of my posts here when I had to put up with her BS and I think....wow - she was a real bitch to almost everyone. In my daily life now the memories of how she really acted are fading away. She is kind of fading away. I'm just so relieved overall that I don't have to deal with her anymore. 

Jolie, your sister may be getting a bunch of attention due to her posts and it reinforces the need to keep it up. Her circle of people won't want to deal with it too long though.

[Jolie40]

She is kind of fading away. I'm just so relieved overall that I don't have to deal with her anymore. 

Hi SunnyMeadow

that is how I feel, also
I rarely think of parents anymore now that they're both gone

it doesn't seem likely any sibling will ever host a Thanksgiving or Christmas
so our family has faded away

we had quiet holidays just husband, teen, and I
no fuss, no more stress

[Call Me Cordelia]

The psalms say about the wicked that they won't even be remembered when they are gone.

God, I hope that's true. I'm NC but they are not gone from this world. I get angry I still think about them as much as I do. Honestly, I've questioned whether posting here is fanning the flames of my anger and grief at times. Similar to your sister upping the drama for her Facebook audience.

It sounds like the most peace you can get from PD people. It's reassuring to hear you are experiencing that after only a month.