checking in

[SunnyMeadow]

Hi everyone. I'm still here reading but haven't been posting much. 

I had a NPD mother and enabling stepdad who both died within weeks of each other in 2022. Since then I occasionally come here to read my old posts about my mother and remember how awful it was. (why do I need that? I don't know!) Maybe because she has faded out of my memory so much. Reading those old posts was causing me anxiety so I quit that. Damn these narcissistic parents, they have caused so much harm and suffering for all of us.

My new life is calm and I'm the grown up now, not the scared little daughter anymore. Don't have to tiptoe around her issues and drama. I never hit a wall of grief after she died, can't say I had any grieving when it came to her. I did with my stepdad though.

Anyway, I'm a grandma now!! I'm so happy my mother isn't around to cause chaos with my daughter. Sad right? It speaks volumes of the kind of women she was. My daughter finally gets a mother who is all in and focused on the moment without worrying about pleasing grandma. 

Just wanted to say hi. This website was a life saver for me. I couldn't have made it through the last part of her life without being here and absorbing all the wise advice from everyone.

She was all-encompassing and my 56 years with her really did a number on me. Really and truly wish I had a normal mother. Since it didn't work out that way, I do my best to be a good, kind and normal mother for my children. 

[xredshoesx]

congrats on the birth of your granddaughter!!!!        we are so proud of you because you made the cycle stop <3 and your daughter and grandbaby have a healthy momma and grandma. 

i think i'll be more like how you were with your mother when my parents eventually pass.  i've been grieving not having parents in one way or another since i was old enough to understand how toxic that my family of origin was, so the passing to the next realm will be the end of that process and the only closure will be not having to look over my shoulder for her  physical presence.  i'm not super close to my father either so i imagine it will be sad, but not as hard as it would be had we been allowed to be in contact when i was a child.

best to you and so glad to hear these updates <3

[Sneezy]

Congratulations, SunnyMeadow!  A granddaughter!!!  What a wonderful blessing.  And yes, extra special because you can fully enjoy being a grandma without having to deal with your toxic mom.

Sending you hugs and joy and happiness - you deserve it 

[moglow]

Sunny! All the very best for your family with the new addition!! I'm so glad you can be there, really be with your daughter through new motherhood. That makes my heart so happy for you - such a wonderful time 

[SonofThunder]

Congratulations on the granddaughter, SunnyMeadow! What a treasure!  Also a joy to see you back again to the boards.  All the best to your growing family and the peace you are now enjoying. ☺️

SoT