Covid and flu were a better Christmas than one with my parents!

[SaintBlackSheep]

Has anyone seen the tiktok content of Mrs. Frazzled? She is a kindergarten teacher who makes satirical reels about dealing with problematic family members using gentle parenting, and it's SO hilarious!!
After successfully dodging a visit from my parents over Thanksgiving, their Christmas visit was a looming dread. We live 10 hours away and they always stay at a hotel (despite the fact that we have plenty of room--I like to reflect on the fact that I used to BEG them to stay at our house instead, and would point out that they could stay even longer with us because they wouldn't have to pay for a hotel! What was I thinking? So much healing has taken place to get me to the point where I wonder "why on earth was I always begging them to spend MORE time with me?!) Anyway, my 10 year old got the flu the week before Christmas, then I got it. I called my parents and nMom said we'd all talk on Friday to reassess their travel plans and see if we'd be feeling better in time or not. So Friday rolls around, I am feeling better, I call them up and nMom says "Oh, we canceled our hotel because you said you were sick!" I said that was fine, I understand fully why someone wouldn't want to stay with recently-sick people. She got in a snit about that, and when I was a big ol' grey rock refusing to manage her feelings and beg her to visit, she said "Oh, actually I didn't cancel our hotel! I've been making so many reservations that I forgot!" THEN she said, "but we aren't ready to leave tomorrow. We didn't pack yet." I said "Oh darn."  
Then she called back to say they were arriving on Christmas Eve. I said "That's not going to work for us." My reason---that I did not get into with them!! Yay me!! No JADE-- is that they should not be making a 10 hour drive anyway, and they are understandably exhausted after. When they show up, of course it's All About Them and they always have 10 big plastic totes full of random garbage that *Must* be brought in by my husband at once, and ooh'd and awww'd over the junk they bring. They'd be arrive during Christmas Eve dinner and I did not want to deal with that chaos right then. I have two kids and wanted to have a nice quiet Christmas Eve with my family without having to play audience and MC to a Narc crazy train. Plus, they've visited us enough times that I know 100% they are always in horrible cranky moods when they arrive after a long drive. No thanks.
Her response was "oh no! The hotel lady is going to get sick of me calling so many times to change the reservations!" I said "So you DID cancel the hotel before, and you DID go ahead and make reservations for Christmas Eve without even checking with us first? Bummer for you. Why don't you come on the 26th? THAT will work best for us."
Cue snit #3, that I also refused to JADE over and was able to just grey rock the heck out of it. (Probably I was still tired from recovering from the flu and did not have the energy!)
So Christmas Eve, my husband ended up coming down with Covid, which really sucked, and my parents had to postpone even more. By the time we were all healthy enough to see anyone, it was January 2nd!! We had a nicer Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, and NYE being sick with flu and Covid than we would have with them! 
They drove in on the 2nd, came over our house on the 3rd and 4th, then drove back on the 5th! 2 days was tolerable, although my teen mostly avoided them, and man, as much as I hate that my kids at 10 and 14 can deal with narcissists like total bosses, it really is gratifying to hear them setting little boundaries. At dinner one night, nMom was telling us something about her butt.    10 said "Gram, that is an inside thought. We are trying to eat." That was right out of Mrs. Frazzled's reels!! I am not affiliated with Mrs. Frazzle in any way, but if you're looking for some healing humor, check out her fb, instagram, or tiktok. 

[NarcKiddo]

I am sorry, but I had to laugh with quiet satisfaction at the snit-fest. It is just so typical. I am sorry you were ill over Christmas but at least you didn't have to deal with the PDs as well. Off to check out Mrs Frazzle...

[Cat of the Canals]

"Gram, that is an inside thought. We are trying to eat." 

I am also off to absorb some of this Mrs. Frazzled wisdom, because this is hilarious and such a perfect response to so many PD topics of conversation.