OMG!!!

[Deby64]

I'm freaking tired y'all. Walking on the eggshells wondering if I will come home to Dr. Jekyll or Mr. Hyde. I decided today to read some of the stop caretaking book to my UNDP. Hoping it will give some give him insight to how I'm feeling. Then I immediately became depressed, realizing he will not internalize the information I want to leave, but I love him. This is a very messed up mental state to be in. I'm starting to be concerned about myself and my mental status. has anyone ever shared some of the information and how was it received.

[square]

Sorry to hear how tough it's been.

Don't share that kind of information with him. If he was concerned about your feelings, you wouldn't be at this point in the first place. He may use this information against you in some way.

Nobody, least of all PDs, want to be told "you have a personality disorder and all our problems are all your fault." I know I would not be receptive to that, even though I'm constitutionally able to admit fault and weakness.

It's up to us to make what changes we can to protect ourselves and let go of hope that the four millionth time we try to explain how much their behavior hurts will finally get through. The issue isn't that we didn't explain it right.

Sending you strength and regard to get through today, and then tomorrow, and then the next day.

[Deby64]

Square, bless you. I truly needed to read that. I know it's the truth, but dang!!!!! I want to be heard. Thought of sharing it just for the explosive response 

[square]

It took me time to let go of the hope, I get it.

[Rebel13]

Thought of sharing it just for the explosive response 

Sometimes the explosions feed a need to feel special or important. Sometimes some people provoke those reactions for that reason. But on some level there's an awareness the explosion isn't a real demonstration of caring, and so that need continues unfilled. 

[notrightinthehead]

Many people have made the attempt to make their partner see and understand. Sadly with a PD it is usually turned against us. Our marriage therapy sessions led to him lecturing me about my problematic personality, which was the reason for our marital problems. He also diagnosed me as narcissistic, homosexual, frigid, depressed and suffering with fearful attachment style.
As long as I didn't abandon all hope of ever changing him, I kept on trying unsuccessfully. I kept on lying to myself. I refused to see and accept reality. It only led to further years of unhappiness.
You are lucky in that your eyes are open already. Just keep on the path of clear vision. Good luck!