Hi I'm Rosie!

[Rosie]

Only recently discovered this whole new world of narcissistic mothers

Have been doing the Daily Practice as described by the Crappy Childhood Fairy for the last three months, and it's changed how I think and feel to the point where my old coping mechanisms now seem silly, so that's why I'm up in the middle of the night thinking 'Now what?'

Looking forward to learning 'what' from you lot!!!
So glad I've found you!

[bloomie]

Rosie - welcome to Out of the FOG! What great progress you are making in your understanding of what to keep and what to leave in terms of coping with the outflow into our lives from a N mother.

The 'now what' journey is unique to each of us, but what we find is there are striking similarities in behaviors that we encounter and in the recovery process. There is something so powerful in seeing bits of our own story, feelings, experiences described by others we have never met.

We learn and grow together in knowing how to reestablish ourselves in healthy, productive ways.

I look forward to supporting you as you continue with your forward movement to healing, self compassion, renewal and strength!

[Rosie]

Thanks bloomie!
Do keep an eye on me please  .

This morning I woke up and thought I still need a way to keep order around the place, because this twice-daily meditation is making me too relaxed to bother to do anything without reminders going off on my phone all the time, which is part of the weirdness I want to move on from, but I'm not yet motivated to casually do jobs as and when I happen to think of them.
Then I thought what I need is more role models to try out, for:  1)smartening myself up, 2)being polite, and 3)getting into routines for the chores. Like they have for running large establishments, such hotels for example. I'd like the place to be like a spa.....or a medieval monastery...or whatever
It's like being a teenager again, trying out new stuff for fit to see what it feels like.

I'm assuming people know about the Daily Practice already, since it's the first thing I discovered, so this WHY I'm going to keep it up for 12 months whether I feel like I need it or not:
Re Regulate
Reduce overwhelm
Improve memory, attention, completing tasks
reduce anxiety, depression - and addiction (only to sugar!)
find better ways of expressing anger
banish hamster wheel thoughts
stop clutter and collecting
stop eating between meals
stop: avoiding people just so as to avoid being triggered
& feeling different like I don't belong
& pushing other people away and not making friends
& getting stuck in limerance

I learnt somewhere on YouTube (probably from the Crappy Childhood Fairy) that I risk going back to doing all that again if I don't rewire my brain over minimum period of 12 months. Nine more to go. It feels like something big happened, deep in there, just a couple of days ago.

[bloomie]

It's like being a teenager again, trying out new stuff for fit to see what it feels like.

That sounds free and like a quest!

I have a daily practice as well, some things that are similar to yours and some different, but all move me through the day and have made a huge difference in my life.