The DNA trap

[Kiko]

The DNA trap is some inexplicable reason where family members get a free pass to abuse your socially..
Telling you what yiu can and can't do ...
What you should think .
When your a kid .. it works ..
But then it sticks ..it's forever..
No ..its not .. it took me  a while to find i was stuck in this DNA  trap .. as a scapegoat ..
Until , I tell you now, things that are said to you ..
By family members.. change them to ' some guy in a pub" saying the same thing..youre reaction would be different...
Even though the request is the same ... its the DNA trap .
If you have this problem..think about it in this way..
The family member rule
The ' some guy' same rule
Ot may help you see,  like a new pair of glasses.

[bloomie]

Kiko - what a great suggestion - to think about what is said or done with a bit of emotional distance is a powerful way to get past the cultural and familial expectations that family = a free pass to behave in ways that are unacceptable and toxic. Thank you for sharing this!