Typing away while leaving npd-lead-workplace

[GoodPesto]

For the last year I sometimes felt like sharing bits and pieces of a new job I had but since I was somewhat paranoid to be found out I didn't share about the latest PD-theatre in my life.
Now I am somewhat in the FOG because I am going to leave and will call in sick until the contract ends, which will most likely end in some guilt trips, a smear campaign or other "pleasentries". Rationally I know exactly I cannot continue working there and have been knowing for a while but somehow all rationalisation doesn't help with the FOG, so I decided to use this plattform to help me go through this phase.

One couldn't make the relationship whirlwind up that has been my workplace for the last year, but I would like to try and paint a part of the picture.

stbx-boss (suspected NPD by a few, one of them his wife) had painted himself as a single-man when I came for the interview and had tried to get me naked on the second meeting. I respectfully declined. A couple of months later when I started working for his company (I had asked for a ridiculous seeming amount of money after his proposal, he was willing to pay it and I was very tired of job hunting), he introduced me to two colleagues, "his wife" and "his (girl)friend".


Colleague no. 2 turned out to be the mistress of stbx-boss ... and has been kept as an open secret for the last 15 years. While he is still trying to make her look like a good friend, she is presenting him as her lover whenever the opportunity arises. 
Colleague No. 1, his wife, has partially seperated from him but is all in all keeping up with all this somehow.

Now one could say: Life is life and humans are human and who cares about all the relationship-stuff. Could be true if you weren't

- constantly asked to work all days of the week, including official holidays with no extra money offered (there is usually a plus for working on sundays, holidays or at night where I live)

- constantly asked to work on short-notice (you e.g. wouldn't have heard until friday afternoon that the upcoming sunday is time to work for you, and that would be long-notice in comparison to all the other changes of your schedule)

- regularly asked to come in to help out while you are taking a vacation, which is of course the lowest amount of days possible by law

- working in a company extremely understaffed ... while stbx-boss is constantly increasing the workload by expanding.


It's been a valuable experience because I took this job as a learning opportunity and have trained my boundary-muscles. I have managed to have two days off a week most time, learned to say no without offering an explanation and have been one of the better compensated workers.

I got sucked in some of the relationship-drama, because it seemed unavoidable (counted 7 intimate relationships among the staff), and also colleague 1, the wife, needed an open ear for her suffering sometimes, but all in all I protected myself better than ever before.

But when pretty much everyone around you in your workplace is suffering and sick because of it, there is no way but to leave.

Typing all this to build up the courage to pass the process of leaving with flying colours without getting distracted by the FOG.

 

[Rebel13]

Oh my gosh GoodPesto, what a nightmare!!! Congratulations to you for getting through all of the drama mostly safely. Your boundary muscles must be so strong from all of those workouts. 

I'm really glad you will be leaving that situation and I hope your next adventure suits you much better.

[GoodPesto]

Thank you Rebel13.

Sent the termination letter yesterday, so it's official.
Since I told him in person last week it's not going to be a surprise. The surprise is that I will not show up at work for the last month and that's causing a lot of FOG. (OG) Partially I feel like I letting colleagues down b/c I know how much there is to do and that they are terribly understaffed. (F) I am afraid of the blowback once the owner of the company realises I am not going to show up at all for the last month (with full compensation) which is going to happen in two or three days.

[Adria]

GoodPesto,

Good job! Get the heck out of there!  Truly a nightmare situation, and the longer you stay, the more you will get entangled one way or another. Something better will come along, you can count on it. That is a YIKES!!! if I ever heard one.

[GoodPesto]

Thanks for cheering me on Adria, it helps.

The universe was on my side as well it seemed as a situation occured today that justified jacking it all in immediately.
The o of the FOG stopped me from being able to see that leaving this place like this instead of orderly (finish all given tasks, work until the last day at the end of the month) is so much more appropriate.
It's a scandal what's happening there on an everyday basis.

Had a bigger task today this afternoon that only me in this company performs, including a two-hour drive plus two hours of cleaning. I was all packed and set up to get this job done today like it was agreed upon and then "that" happened in my morning shift and I just put the basket with all the cleaning stuff on the owner's desk to see when he comes in and left the office building.

Gossip will take care of the rest as one colleague witnessed "that" and double-checked I planned to leave for good.

Gosh am I relieved.

[GoodPesto]

The content of the expected smear campaign has reached me.
The owner of the company is now sharing with my former colleagues that I am apparently deeply disorderd and that I belong admitted to a secure ward. What a classic.

[Rebel13]

Oh geez. It would be nice if once in a while they came up with a new tactic, wouldn't it?

I hope this isn't bothering you too much. I'm sure the decent people who know you, or will meet you, will be able to see through the lies and appreciate the person and professional that you are.