Unavoidable interaction strategies

[skybox]

Looking for tips on how to manage. Am no contact with xnpd, but adult child related occasion is coming up, which will force unavoidable proximity.

I need tips to keep balance- the day should be joyful for offspring, and not stressful.

One odd thing / X likely to be first and centre on photos etc ( expert at this) -also likely to drag new Mrsnpdh.

On the one hand, letting go of all expectations - and accepting situation/ and on the other, creating safe space .

Any feedback welcome.

[skybox]

Planning ahead-  My fear is being cornered or manipulated into contact.  I am scared, and need to take care of mental health around this massive alarm to the nervous system. It is a few weeks away.

Am thinking to talk to adult kid(s) prior to this and suggest they prioritize xnpdh and that I will attend ceremony, and have another «  non special event » next year.

It makes me sad, knowing this is «  how it is » - and that I will seen as «  difficult ».  Such a contrast with the reality.

[NarcKiddo]

Is it possible for you to attend with somebody who can look out for you and get you out of being cornered? It sounds like a special day (wedding?) for one of the adult kids and it is probably kindest to try to leave them out of any planning you need to do around the occasion. Unless they are themselves fully aware and might be worrying about the situation, in which case it might be good to have a family chat and for you and all adult kids to agree on protocol. These things can be hard to navigate but I hope your kids will be understanding and not see you as difficult.

[skybox]

Thanks Narc Kiddo - having someone with me if possible is a good thought. One kid understands, and I will quietly explain nearer time.